CHAPTER TWENTY FOUR-THE CONVERSATION

Imara sat on the edge of the garden pool with her feet in the water. Her lips were swollen and chapped from the unending stream of tears. She inhaled deeply and smiled as the warm wind blew through her hair and eased the ache in her heart for just a second.

Dying isn’t what you think it is. For supernaturals, death is a rebirth. Whether it’s on Earth or in the Realm, life goes on. When Imara died, her soul tried to enter the Realm only to be ripped out of its warm embrace by the cold, evil hands of the curse. Knowing what awaits her there made the cruel reality she was living in all that much worse.

She looked into the air and begged for mercy. “I can’t do it anymore. Please blessed mother let me go home this time. Don’t make me come back. I’ll do anything.”

As she heard the door shut, she fanned her face dry then sat up straight. Thorin pulled up a metal chair and sat beside his sister. “I’m worried about you, darlin. Is there anything I can do for you, Imara?”

She glanced away from the water and shook her head no. Imara leaned over and skimmed her hand across the water and smiled to herself. “Are you going to tell me the truth now? I think the time for keeping secrets is long gone.”

Thorin looked down at her and smirked. “Who told you?”

Imara shook the water off her hand then sighed and looked up to Thorin. “Thomas.”

Thorin chuckled out loud. “Of course, it was. He never much approved of the way me and Shaw coddled you.”

Thorin sighed as he looked up into the evening sun.

“You know, the truth is dangerous when you only have a small piece of it. This one time, Haldir told me my mate had blonde hair and blue eyes. So, every time I saw some blonde haired, blue eye woman, I naturally thought she was my mate and acted like a damn fool. It drove me completely mad. I looked for that woman everywhere and I still haven’t found her. You see, having a little bit of knowledge can be a terrible thing if there’s no context. I know a little bit about my mate but not enough to be useful because in the end, it isn’t up to me, it’s up to Fate. We knew a little tiny bit about how your life would unfold, but not enough to be able to stop what happened. We assumed they’d come after you because of your gifts. No one could’ve known that some secret from Anna’s past would be your undoing. We all did the best we could with what we knew. I’m mighty sorry for how I drug you all around the South all those years. I did what I thought was best with the truth as I knew it.” Thorin’s lip quivered and he stopped to compose himself again. “I’m so sorry, darlin. I tried so hard to keep you safe, but I just didn’t know which way to turn. I was just throwing punches in the dark and hoping for the best.”

Imara put her arm around Thorin's calf and put her cheek against his knee. “I know that. I appreciate everything you and Shaw ever did for me. There’s no better brother anywhere Thorin. You’re the absolute best.” As she remembered how hard Shaw fought for her, she licked her lips and said, “You should know, Shaw did everything he could to save us. That warlock was just too powerful. He ripped Eliza right from those big strong arms.”

Thorin looked up to the sky and blinked away his tears. “I have no doubt about that. Shaw loved you like you were his own daughter, Imara. You were his entire reason for living, it was his pleasure to die for you. Don’t you feel guilty about that. It’s what he wanted.”

Imara looked down into the water as the wheels of her mind started to move. “So, remember that promise you made to me?”

Thorin pushed the tears from his eyes and said, “I’ve made you a lot of promises over the years, my dear. You’ll need to be more specific.”

Imara rubbed her cheek against the rough wool threads in Thorin’s pants leg. “You promised me that if anything happened to me, you’d make sure Ben got to me again. You’d watch over him and make sure he wasn’t left alone.”

A terrible feeling started seeping into Thorin’s core as he looked down at Imara. “Yes, darlin. I remember that.”

Imara nodded and she looked out across the pool. “Good. Do you think...this curse, if something changed, say if something were to happen to me before Selvin could get to me or if I never have Eliza, that it would break the curse?”

Thorin closed his eyes. He prayed to whoever was up above pulling the strings above them that Imara wasn’t thinking what he thought she was. “No Imara, I don’t believe it would. I believe it would just start all over again. The curse it…it won’t ever let go of you until it’s done.”

Imara let out a ragged breath as her eyes filled with tears. “I’m so afraid, Thorin. I can’t face that man again. I won’t do it. I won’t let him hurt her.”

Thorin looked off into the distance as he ran his fingers through her hair. “I know, darlin. I know.”

Thorin remembered back to the night he and Haldir returned from New Orleans. He went home and spoke with Sofia about packing his things because they’d be leaving for the Realm that night. He and Haldir misted to the cottage only to find the bodies of his whole family. He and Haldir spent the night stacking and burning the bodies in the corn field. Imara had only just discovered the gut-wrenching grief and horror that Thorin’s been living with for 50 years. The one he would undoubtedly be facing again very soon. Thorin knew they may have to relive that nightmare many times before they got Selvin, but he promised Imara he would make sure it got done no matter how long it took.

“Don’t you give up, Imara. I know you’re afraid, sweet girl. No one could blame you for the thoughts swimming around that pretty little head, but we got to see this thing through. When he comes again, we’ll be waiting. He won’t best us this time.” Imara sucked back a sob then just let them flow while Thorin gently rubbed her head.

After seeing Imara to her room, Thorin went to the parlor and poured himself a drink as he thought about his conversation with her. 

“Thorin, you need to watch Imara closely. She’s not right here,” Haldir said pointing to his head. “She’s been talking crazy things.”

Ben rolled his eyes away from the picture window and glanced over his shoulder. “She lost her baby Haldir, how the fuck is she supposed to act?” 

Thorin swallowed the last of his drink then set it on the table and licked his lips. “Haldir’s right. She can‘t be trusted right now. She’s making her own plans on how to end all this, and it doesn’t include facing that monster again. I’ll have Jasper send over guards starting tomorrow.”

“I’ll stay with my wife,” said Ben as he watched the world pass by the window.

Thorin sat down in his chair and bumped his fist into the arm of it. “No Ben, we have work to do and she’s still quite upset with you anyway.”

When the men were finished talking, Ben returned to bed and laid beside Imara. She was turned away from him, but he knew she was awake. “What are you thinking, baby?”

“I don’t want to get pregnant, Ben. Not until Selvin’s gone. I can’t lose Eliza again. I can’t.”

Ben felt a burning in his throat. “I understand. We’ll be careful.” When she didn’t respond, Ben licked his lips and rubbed the mark on his chest. “Or do you mean that you don’t want me anymore?” asked Ben.

Imara rubbed her fingers back and forth the soft cotton sheets underneath her. “It was you that said loving me was a mistake, Ben.”

He grabbed Imara’s arm and pulled her over to face him. “That’s not what I said, Imara, and it sure as hell wasn’t what I meant.” He looked over her swollen, splotchy tear-soaked face and traced her cheek with his fingers. “I thought if I could make you not love me, or if I could try to not love you, that all this would end. I was happy just to let you go on not remembering a damn thing. I didn’t want this pain for you, Imara, but…there is no not loving you. It’s like the air I breathe. I need it. I can’t go on without it.” He took her hand and put them to his chest. “I love you so much. I’d let you go on never remembering our life together or that you ever even knew me if it would keep you safe from all this.”

The sting of her tears on her chapped skin was nothing compared to the pain coursing through Imara’s body. She looked into Ben’s eyes and said, “Nothing in the world ever hurt me as much as you not loving me Ben. Nothing.”

Ben pushed the tears from Imara’s face. “I was trying to love you the best I could, baby. I know I was wrong for what I did. Please forgive me.”

Imara closed her eyes and leaned into Ben’s chest. As he combed his fingers through her hair, he said, “You know, everyone’s afraid baby. They all think you’re going to do something awful. That you’re saying things you shouldn’t. Please tell me that they’re wrong. You can’t leave me here all alone, Imara. I was so miserable and lost without you.”

Imara played in Ben’s chest hair and replayed the talk she had with Thorin in her mind. “I won’t Ben. You won’t ever be alone.”