LOGINShare
Chapter 49
publish date:
2020-09-24 20:44:27“tia. What are you doing here?”
“I’m angry.”
“Okay . . .”
“I need someone to let me be angry.”
She gave me a little smile. “Well, that’s my specialty. Come on.” She led me back to her room and pointed at the desk chair. “Sit. Start your rant whenever you’re ready. I will be here to egg you on.” She plopped down on her bed then she stood up again. “Hold on. I feel like we need some angry music as our background.” She pulled out her phone, scrolled through a few screens, then pushed Play. Music poured through some wireless speakers on the bookshelf. She adjusted the volume so it wasn’t too loud.
I laughed.
“Laughing and anger do not go together.”
“Stop trying to make me laugh, then.”
“I’m not. I’m totally with you on this. What are we angry about again?”
“My brother.”
She raised her fist in the air. “Totally with you. Carry on.”
“So he called this morning, not to apologize but to tell me I wasn’t supposed to be at the stupid ceremony.”
“He did not.”
“He did.”
“That jerk.”
“And then my parents watched the video.”
“Were they crushed?”
“No, they were proud.”
“Proud?”
“Yes!” I stood and started pacing the room. “They told me they hoped I would be proud too, eventually.”
“They watched it? Are you sure?”
“I didn’t see them, but I’m pretty sure.”
“That’s lame.”
“It is, right? Am I being stupid? Do I have the right to be mad?”
“tia, I’m mad and I’m not even you.”
“But you’re mad about everything.”
“Not entirely true, but I do enjoy my angry times.” She sat there for a moment, on her bed, staring at me. “Well?”
“Well, what?”
“You’re angry. What are you going to do?”
I stopped pacing, my shoulders still tight with tension. “I don’t know.” I’d obviously felt angry before but my goal had always been to smash it down, keep it inside, not let anyone see it. I groaned when I realized that I was just like my parents. That’s what they always did. They didn’t like us to express bad feelings because that would imply our family was less than perfect. Even my mom’s appearance always portrayed perfection. They kept everything inside. I kept everything inside.
“Scream.”
I looked toward the door. “I’m not really a screamer.” Even realizing what I just had about my parents, about myself, it was hard to just let go of that, to let go of a lifetime habit. But I wanted to. I needed to. My insides were on fire and I knew I needed to let some of those feelings out.
“Just scream.”
I took a deep breath and screamed.
She smiled. “You have a lot of work to do but that was a good start. Now let’s scream at your brother.”
“I’m not calling my brother.”
“No, I just mean scream things and hope he can hear them. Like . . .” She threw back her shoulders. “What’s his name again?”
“Drew.”
“Drew, you are a huge jerk and a horrible brother!”
“Who doesn’t even know how to apologize right!”
“And who has funny-looking hair!”
I tilted my head. “You think his hair is funny looking?”
“For sure. He needs to cut it shorter or grow it out longer. You can tell him I said that.”
I laughed.
“It helps a little, right?”
“Yes.” It really did. The fire in my chest wasn’t quite as red hot.
She lay back on her bed and looked at the ceiling. I looked up as well and saw that, along with the nature photographs on her wall, she had some on the ceiling too. “Those are great pictures. Do you collect them from all the places you visit?”
“I take them.”
“They’re yours? I didn’t know you were a photographer.”
“I try. We went on this three-week trip around the States. That’s where I took most of them.”
“Hayden told me about that trip.”
She smiled. “That’s right. I’m sure he said it was like a trip to the underworld or something, and I like to pretend that too, but we both loved it. He forced us to play his stupid games. We fought a lot and laughed a lot and learned a lot.”
“I think it sounds fun.”
“‘Fun’ probably isn’t the right word, but it was an experience.”
In the quiet that followed her statement, I felt awkward, like I hadn’t earned the right to be here asking for her help. We hardly knew each other. “So . . . are you doing anything today? Hanging out with Nate?”
She sighed. “No. It’s hard to just hang out with him. Nate is just . . .” She shrugged. “I don’t know. He’s just Nate.”
“Do you want him to be your boyfriend?”
“Sometimes.” She picked up her pillow and flipped it over then patted it a few times. “And sometimes I want to strangle him. I think I might need to get the second impulse under control before I work on the first.”
“Why do you want to strangle him?”
“Because he’s clueless. He has a crush on this other girl who is totally out of his league.”
Latest chapter
Filling in the Boyfriend spot Last chapter
I smiled. “Nice. Payback is so fun.”“And immature.”“So immature. Is she going to kill us?”“Absolutely. But in the meantime . . .” His lips found mine again and I relaxed into him.Thanks for reading I hope u liked my story? till next timeI hope u guys leave a comment of what you think of the story.Should I add more or is the ending good?I really had fun with this story because it was me imagining of what it would be like to have some love you like the way hayden did ?I will be writing on my new story I hope you all will read it to thanks again ?
Filling in the Boyfriend spot Chapter 69
I scanned the crowd again. Things felt different tonight. Normally people were saying hi or talking to me, trying to catch my eye. Tonight eyes drifted past mine without thought or interest. Things had shifted. It didn’t sting as much as I thought it would. I didn’t deserve to be noticed any more than anyone else, especially because I rarely tried to notice people back. I was still working on being better about that.There was a group that was getting a lot of notice. I hadn’t thought Claire, Laney, and Mea would come, not after their reaction to my public apology. Dirty looks during the rally had been followed by complete radio silence since, but they had come. It wasn’t to make up with me, though, because they’d pointedly ignored me all night. And they were surrounded by people.My boyfriend had his own graduation party tonight, and his sister, my only friend at the present time, was only a junior. So that’s how I cam
Filling in the Boyfriend spot Chapter 68
“Tom is waiting for me. We drove together up here.”“Tom is still here?” I looked around, waiting for him to appear out of nowhere again.“Not here but I left him at a driving range.”“Golf?”“Yes.”“I didn’t know he liked golf.”“Yeah, he doesn’t know much about you either.”“It’s pathetic, I know.”“What’s pathetic is that I am going to be stuck driving with him for the next three hours and we have absolutely nothing in common.”I laughed and gave him a hug. “Thanks for the thought. Thanks for . . . Thanks.”Five minutes after my brother left, my mom walked in the front door. She paused when she saw me then quickly replaced her open mouth of surprise with a smile. “tia, hi. You’re home.”I stood. “Mom, no need to pretend you’re not upset. I was really mean to you this
Filling in the Boyfriend spot Chapter 67
“She had a rough day. Everyone at school is gossiping about her. I think her friends must’ve found out about prom. You need to talk to her.”Hayden’s playful act was gone as his whole face turned serious. He looked at me. My smile had disappeared too.“I’m sorry,” he said. “I had no idea.”“Don’t tell me that,” Bec said. “Tell her.”“I will.”“What?”“I have to go.”He hung up to her objections then pulled me into a hug. “I’m sorry.”I shrugged. “It’s fine.”“You did not just say that.”I laughed a little. “Okay, it sucks. My best friend won’t talk to me.”“Claire?”“Yes. I tried to apologize. She’s really mad. Not that I blame her. I’d be mad too, but I think she doesn’t want to be my roommate anymore. She and mea are going to room together.”
Filling in the Boyfriend spot Chapter 66
I nodded, our faces still very close together.“My preference is simple—you.”“That was not a yes-or-no answer. You just broke the ru—”He cut me off by pressing his lips to mine. They were so warm that my whole body seemed to melt against him. He slipped his arms around my waist and pulled me closer, deepening the kiss as he did. My hands found his hair, not needing an excuse to touch him this time, knowing I could do this whenever I wanted.A shiver went through me and he smiled against my lips. “So, not a disappointment?”I didn’t answer, just kissed him more.We sat on the ground, our backs pressed up against the Camaro, our shoulders pressed together, tossing a baseball back and forth between his right hand and my left.“Thank you,” he said after we’d completed several catches each.“For what?”
Filling in the Boyfriend spot Chapter 65
I pulled my arm back and threw the ball with all my might. It hit the door with a loud clank then bounced off and rolled across the ground. The ding it left in the rusted door was hardly noticeable and only heightened my need to do damage. Real damage. I picked up another ball and hurled it. Then another.Soon it wasn’t just Hayden I was trying to crush but mea and my parents, Drew and myself. I reached down for another ball and felt nothing but dirt. I had thrown them all. My heart rate was high and my cheeks were wet with sweat and maybe a few tears.I started to gather the balls when behind me I heard, “Do you want to throw a few at the actual person those are intended for or is the car satisfying enough?”I whirled around. Hayden held out his arms like he was really giving me permission to pelt him. It was tempting.My shoulders rose and fell several times. After the week I’d had, I
