Haunted by my Future

"Look at you, did you just came out of your grave?" Josh said putting his phone down.

"Could you just be quiet, I'm not in the mood today" I said and walked past him.

"Uhhhh, someones moody" He said with a smirk on his face. "Did someone's date didn't go out well?"

Ignoring him, I walked over to my desk, which was next to his office space.

Josh has a office space for two just for himself. And THAT has two reasons.

I get paid a little bit more to stay next to the office from Josh. Although he sometimes can be a burden to someone with his behavior, I somehow managed it to stay here since I need more money and this is the only way to get it without my mother noticing it.

The woman who shared the office with me, left a week ago, due to pregnancy. Yes, I know that these informations are none of your business and not interesting at all, but I just wanted to make a few things clear. Even if it includes some unuseful informations like that. I picked up my papers, sighed and looked back at Josh, who was arguing with someone over the telephone.

Same happenings, same endings. Nothing changed. Everyday... It was always like everyday... How did I endured this till today?

So now to the introduction:

I'm working at a Call Center. Not the best job if you hate humans like me. The funny thing is, I have to deal with every kind of them. 

Actually... No, I'm not and I have a lot of work to do.

Sooo, long story short: 

Right, Josh! 

'What does it feels like to be popular? What if I become one day popular too?, do I still feel lonely then too?'

"As if I would find that out, especially in the situation that I'm in! My whole. flipping. life!" I thought, not noticing, that I spoke it out loudly. I've never had a mobile phone. And I'm always questioning myself, why everyone is so addicted with it. Always smiling and chatting with someone. Don't they get bored after chatting so much?!

'Actually... Having a little computer in your bag, must be really cool. I mean, you can do everything with it!' But being addicted to it doesn't sounds welcoming at all!-

"DO YOU JUST SAID SOMETHING?!" Josh screamed through the room, rolling his chair right next to me. "If it's something about Jessica, tell me. I promise you I'll tell it to no one! Oh, hold on, I'll bring you some coffee!-"

"N-No! I mean- Ahhg just forget it" Resting my back to the chair, I runned with my hands through my hair questioning how to tell him that I wasn't talking about Jessica... 

And NOW back to the things, I wanted to tell you:

Gosh, why is life so harsh to me? 

I'm talking way to much again, am I?

................

The day passed by slowly and I made myself ready to go. The Call Center is not really big, but has a lot of small rooms to keep safety and privacy for the caller. The walls in here are all painted in grey and are not decorated at all.

It always felt really empty here, like something's missing this place to be more lively...

On my way down the hallway, many of my co-workers were packing their things. All of them are by now totally stressed out and it was clear that everyone just wanted to go back home.

Sometimes, I'm even wondering how their life is going on, but I've never made an effort to get to know them, neither did they. Do I really look so scary that people avoid me? I know, I never gave any efforts to get to know them, but being a loner isn't cool too, especially with the parents I have. A friendship would be the worst thing, I could do to myself... and I'm not even joking!

While thinking about it... Is it odd if I say, that one side of me feels better on my own than with others? This could be the only reason how I survived till now.

'Not having anyone to talk to... feels like a million stings in my heart.'

'Somehow it feels like it's because of me...'

I always had to obey my parents and had to act the way they told me. One day I disappointed my mother so badly, she unwillingly told me, that her and my father had to go through a rough time because of me and my actions.

"Are you hungry Honey-" I didn't let her finish and quickly walked upstairs to my bedroom. Today is a special day. Today I'm going to get me, for the first time of my life, a ticket to freedom, far away of this living hell, called life.

In my 22 years, I never had a vacation like everyone else. And it would change from tomorrow on. Sitting on my desk, I opened my already- or let me just say almost broken laptop. "Seems like we both live the same life lappi, getting old and dusty." I sighed and looked to my left. A picture of me and my parents was hanging framed on the wall. My mother Kate Beckett and my father James Beckett both have blonde hair and blue eyes. Except for me. I have brown hair and grayish eyes...

"Soooo back to my plan..." I smiled and bought myself a ticket to the Philippines, to an Island called Palawan. There is a City called Quezon in that island, which I eagerly want to visit. I know it's far away, but it's the perfect place to have a real vacation. Or be far faaaaaaaaaar away from England.

I already did all the research at my office. Since I only have a limited time with my lappi. What that means?

"The plane is heading up tomorrow at dawn. That means, I have to pack as fast as I can, find a way to leave this house without any noise and find a way to go to the Airport. And for that, I have to call a Taxi while I don't own a phone" I trailed off " Gosh, it could've been so handy right now!"

'Just take it from the living room'

I don't care if I loose my job and get kicked out of this house. I worked so much till today, I really deserve it. I don't have friends because of them, which led me to work at part-time Jobs to not end up in a pond full of boredness.

My mother took in my salary every month, I faked my monthly intake and was able to save enough money till today. She always said, that I would spend this money for unnecessary things, but I know exactly, that she bought herself new bags and clothes with the money... 

Now I have enough money to live a year with. It's not much, but enough to start a new life with my own decisions. I'm strong enough to stand on my own two feet's and no one's gonna be able to stop me!

______________________________________________________________________________________

Hey Lovelies,

First of all: Thank you for choosing my book to read in your free time! It's an honor to be a part of your reading list and I really hope to not disappoint you through the chapters!

So what do you think so far? 

Have a lovely day

Hati.