Pre-Zero

What to write? Hmm. Annoying. Just write. Need more chips. Get 'em after. Whoever finds this, don't care, but whatever. Don't really see this getting into hands that ain't mine. Know to whom diary belongs, wouldn't be reading if u didn't. Doesn't even look like one jfc, scribbles. Nevermind. If you're reading this, u r either my descendant, someone close, or an unknown who found mess I'm writing in. Too confused in some parts, got scattered pages from previous books wrote in, lackluster at times. Dealing with stuff, chaotic. Incoherent to most what I write anyways, need thought when reading, low n not wanting to correct shit. Thinking of, might not have made it alive, or may have, would explain if u got it without going through me, or got it from me. Trying to see things clearly. Time is tortuous, too many splits in the stream, but kept track of my course, in a way. So, idk, can judge mine, but honestly idc. Think so far did what I could to change this shithole, so, perhaps, who kno

So, hello. Shitty day it's been, almost got blown up in a shootout, coz some fuckin retard let go of his grenade near a fuckin crate full of those! As always, I'm out alive, S-tier luck is my trademark on that kind of bs. Death missed me again, for now, the dance with the reaper is on till I'm down on my meta. Omens aside, got hit in left arm by shrapnel, singular, reminder something so tiny is gonna have me below n rotting in a grave too, if lucky to be buried. Life got no considerations for weak or strong, just or unjust; when you're out, maggots or whatever still munch till all testimony to your being is fucking whatever identifiable left, and even that's a grace. Many aren't esteemed and are denied the dignity to return to dust, they end up as odd stews or disposed in revulsing ways. Really not worth knowing some worth stuff if you know even your remains won't find solace, but frankly, one shouldn't care bout that. We all live to die, after the ultimate extreme you're no differe