Killduck

"No," I wanted to say. "Absolutely not!"

Yet, this last bout of shocking news had taken its toll on my weary body, and just as I opened my mouth to utter my answer, I had already succumbed into sleep.

My dreams this time were a clutter of incoherent images. There was a moment when I was in complete darkness, and all I could hear was the flapping of wings. In another second, I saw a decrepit, but magnificent building with countless spires and barred windows. And lastly, my dreams took me back into the grass field where I had danced with the sleeping creature. I approached it, staring at its tenderly sleeping face, and when I had come close enough to touch it, it suddenly opened its mouth and shrieked.

I woke up with a start, only to find myself wondering if I was still in a dream. Right at my face was a white thing that kept moving around erratically. I screamed, and hastily moved back, and in the process, I had fallen right out of my bed and onto the hard floor.

"Gah!" I shouted, my heart still beating wildly from both dreams and reality. Perched on top of my bed was a white, fat, and quite ugly bird. It looked at me with judging and intelligent eyes.

"Did it wake you?" I heard someone ask from behind me. Tilting my head back, I saw the head assassin's face, upside down.

Remembering her last words to me right before I had embarrassingly fallen asleep, I felt my cheeks blush. I scrambled into a stand and bowed a greeting towards the tiny woman. She brushed my formalities off and crossed the room to sit on the bed, petting the fat bird with gentle hands.

"Umm... Might I ask where we are?" I muttered, standing there and shifting from foot to foot.

"Oh." She looked up at me, as though finally remembering I was still there. "Right. You fell into unconsciousness right after the ceremony. We had to bring you to our little sickroom to let you rest. I wouldn't live with myself if I'd let that old man bring you back home all dead-like."

"... Dead-like?" I uttered. "A-And what of Farseer? Does he know I'm here?"

Eva thought about it seriously. "Humm... I do recall having sent a message? Or perhaps I had simply imagined that..."

I wobbled on the steady ground. 'Should I even trust this clumsy headed assassin?'

She clapped her hands together. "Anyway! I'm here to give you this little one. You'll be taking care of him from now on."

"... The bird?" I asked dumbfoundedly. It was simply too random a request, especially since I had just woken up, that I could hardly process anything that the assassin had said. "You want me to take care of a bird?"

I looked at the specimen. It was about the height of man's foot, yet as wide as more than half of that. It definitely didn't look like those elegant doves I once saw in the palace aviary. In fact, although it was arguably white-colored, it wasn't the pure kind. It looked more like an off-white that made you think of dirtied rags. On its chest were two brown lines made out from soft downy feathers. It might've been cute, but with it squatting down like a round ball with angry, beady eyes... I couldn't feel any love for it.

"Uhh... It's..." I murmured, having a stare-off with the bird.

"Magnificent, isn't he?" Eva praised, making the bird stretch out its non-existent neck in pride.

"Umm... Sure," I replied.

The bird quacked much like a high-pitched duck. Eva looked at it adoringly.

"Then, that settles it!" she said. "You'll be in charge of him now. Give him a name and make sure he gets fed every two days."

"What?" I stuttered, and then remembered I could hardly complain to an assassin. "I-I mean, what should I feed it... him?"

"Well, Killducks could eat most anything. They're vicious predators themselves," she muttered in thought. "But, well! Just feed it whatever you're eating! They have such a great digestive system they can survive in the harshest of weathers!"

I looked at the paunchy thing trying to keep its balance while simply standing. 'This guy can survive in harsh weathers?'

"Well, I suppose I'll leave you both to bond!" Eva said, standing up. "I'll have Eleina fetch you out and back into that old man's wily grasps. I do expect you to come meet me every other day, though. I'd like to see how your training is going from time to time."

She was at the door when I realized what her words had meant. "Wait! High Monk Eva, what do you mean by training?"

She looked at me like I was stupid. "The training to become an assassin apprentice, of course."

"B-But I didn't say yes!" I sputtered. "I don't want to kill people at all!"

"But, I've told you the Order was a good organization, didn't I?"

"And you told me any organization who kills as its main trait can never be called good!" I replied back.

"Oh, well, then," she mumbled, clearly looking troubled before making a flirtatious wink. "I guess I lied?"

I complained a bit more but she only countered my words with even more nonsense. Soon, she had managed to escape from the room, and although I tried to follow after her, I realized I would just get lost in the complicated and mysterious corridors if I lost sight of her. I sighed, returning back into the room and sitting down right beside the bird.

We stared at each other quietly.

"She doesn't really mean that, does she?" I asked it.

It tilted its head, its short beak opening in the air. It seemed to be saying, 'Are you stupid or something?'

"Yeah, it would be stupid if I go through the training," I replied. "I don't ever want to kill anyone."

"Even if it means you can achieve all your dreams?"

I flinched, at first thinking that the bird had actually spoken, but then I realized someone else had entered the room. I thought it would be Eleina, but it was the young assassin. I believe her name was Zepherin.

"Oh, hi," I said, not even surprised anymore at how easily these assassins could sneak up to me. "Eva just gave me a bird."

She looked down at the fatty on my bed. "It's magnificent."

... I didn't know if she was kidding.

"Anyway, congratulations," I told her with a sincere smile. "The inauguration ceremony was something else, but I'm glad you got assigned to Eva like you wanted."

"Yeah, but..." She seemed to be conflicted about something, but soon, she smiled again. "Anyway, this bird means you're finally in your first step as a trainee."

"... Can you help me out or something? The High Monk doesn't really listen to me, but maybe she'll listen to you. I mean, I don't even want to become an assassin," I told her. "I'm happy to just be a guest of the Order, but I don't wish to become one of you."

Zepherin tilted her head, her white hair dangling from her ponytail. "But, Eva is never wrong in her recruitments. You might not wish it now, but the Master has deemed you worthy to become one of us."

I grew frustrated. "... Well, maybe your Master is wrong. I'm not a murderer."

She flinched, her eyes wide with shock and hurt. I realized the assassins probably never thought of their 'sacred duties' as murder.

"I-I'm sorry..." I mumbled, searching desperately for any signs of hope of forgiveness in the child's eyes.

Zepherin quickly shook her head, and a smile returned to her face. "No, it's fine. I suppose our holy actions would only look like murder in an outsider's eyes. You might be right and you really aren't meant to be one of us. I'll make sure to relay your message to my teacher."

Watching the girl bow and smile as she left the room, I knew I had truly hurt her feelings.

"Ugh... Why did I have to say that?" I mumbled into a pillow. Then, peeking an eye at the bird beside me, I saw it looking at me quite condescendingly. I grumbled, "Yeah, yeah. That was really uncalled for..."

It shrieked a little bit before hopping out of the bed and back into its cage. Even when I called for it, it didn't even look at me anymore.

'Great,' I thought in despair. 'Even the bird hates me.'

I let myself wallow in my despair and hid myself under the covers of the bed.