Chapter 21

    When Jay arrived at the tenement house where Bryan, together with Dave, hired the apartment, she stopped the engine and stayed in the car for a while. She was watching her boyfriend walking around the living room in a worm light coming out from a fireplace, as she supposed. He looked upset. He was talking by the phone and from time to time he was combing his hair nervously. She leaned her hands on the steering wheel, her head on them and studied calmly his face and body language, which clearly said that something was wrong. In every gesture he made, she could see nerves, his muscles were strained to the limits and he tried very hard not to lose control over himself.

    Jay knew that the Weakfields are having a dispute with Leonor’s distant cousin, who claimed rights to the land where their stud stood. He wasn’t interested in land itself, much less in the horses. All he cared about was money. And Bry’s family had enough of it to pay for peace. ‘But that would be too easy, right?’ She thought.

    After fifteen minutes, crowned with nods and few deep breaths, he ended the phone call. He didn’t lose his temper and he didn’t throw anything, so it must have been their lawyer, not that rat Greg. Jay wanted to give him time to calm down, but then she felt that. She didn’t even suppose that Bryan would be able to send so strong signals. She could feel anger, disappointment, indecision, guilty, helplessness. And incredibly strong need. He thought about her so intensely, that she felt goose bumps.

    Without thinking she grabbed her bag, got out of the car and hurried towards the front door. The moment she raised her hand to knock, the ground floor apartment’s door opened wide. She saw mental fatigue and resignation in his eyes. She crossed the threshold, slammed the door, slipped her bag into the corner and hugged him without a word. He clung to her and wrapped his arms desperately around her, burying his face in her silky soft hair. She was stroking him tenderly, wandering with her hands through his hair, shoulders, arms. She focused on passing positive energy to him and moving quitters away. She felt his lips on her neck, straight on the pulse.

    He couldn’t resist her. Her scent surrounded him like a soft mist, separating him from the outer world. Her touch was extremely soothing, and made everything else unimportant. As if only she was able to understand what he felt in prospect of losing what he loved. He had the impression, that she knew everything about him.

    Jay was aware that Bry didn’t care about money, luxury and social status didn’t matter to him. But horses were his life. One could say that he grew up in stable. He was seven, when he helped the first foal to come into the world. And now someone wanted to take it away.

    He hugged her stronger. Almost desperately. The moment he felt the taste of her skin, the world swirled. He wanted more. Much more. His lips wandered along her jaw, and his hands moved from her back to hips in one smooth movement, and then lazily wandered along her waist up to delicate roundness of her breasts. She gave a muffled moan and her breath was broken.

    He suddenly realized that he should touch her this way. Fondly. Gently. To kindle slowly. To taste her like a ripe dry wine.

    He took her face into his hands and looked deep into those bottomless, turquoise springs.

    - Make love to me. – These words, he uttered in a horse whisper, made her heart begin to hit the ribs like a bird’s wings against the walls of too small cage. She felt the growing desire, but also fear. In his eyes she saw something, that hadn’t been there before.

    Tenderness. Affection.

    Love.

    He can’t fall in love with her! It would destroy him! She thought desperately in a sudden rush of panic. But she was already sinking her fingers in his hair, and after her famous self-control and rationality there remained not even a trace.

    Though she tried to think soberly, she wasn’t able to shake the dust off. She surrendered to his gentle caresses and passionate kisses. She let him lead her into the living room, where the pleasant warmth spread, and a soft bed was waiting in front of the fireplace. Next to it there were her favorite wine and delicate crystal glasses.

    - Maybe it’s a little bit too late for that, - he said when he put her on fluffy pillows, - but I’d like this evening to be perfect. – He leaned forward and placed a light kiss on her lips.

    He was in no hurry. He decided to give her the tenderness and gentleness she deserved. He wanted her to feel like a woman. Worshiped. Desirable. He had long loved her and waited patiently for her. Once he had decided to take the first step, he was prepared to act slowly, cautiously. The trust Jay showed him made him feel too confident. Only when she began avoiding him, he realized that haste is his enemy. He could see that Jay has doubts. That she fights. He wanted her to surrender. But not on an impulse. That would be too easy and unstable. He wanted her to do it consciously. So as her decision would be well thought out.

    He teased her lips with the tip of his tongue until she parted them. At this silent invitation he deepened the kiss and completely immersed in it. She tasted like vanilla and caramel. She gave a quiet sigh when his hand moved from her stomach to the breast. Through thin blouse material he rubbed the nipple until it hardened. Her breath became broken and blood pulsed in her veins like a torrent. She felt his hands slowly slipping under her blouse. His touch burned like real fire. His nimble fingers unbuttoned her blouse and exposed soft hills, covered with delicate lace, and golden, well-carved belly.

    He raised her slightly and took off her blouse and bra. He kissed her flat stomach moving slowly up, watching her face, lit with a soft fire glow, at the same time. When he was caressing her breast with his tongue, she arched her body to ease him access and be even closer to him. She clenched her fists on his hair and hissed craving more. He laid down next and came back to her lips catching very trembling breath and groan which came out of her clenched throat. He slowly unfastened her jeans and wandered along the line where her velvety skin touched the lace. She raised her hips slightly expressing readiness and impatience.

    He broke away from her swollen lips to look at her. He waited patiently until she opened her eyes. He wanted to see them. She looked at him with misty eyes, which shone like emeralds and sapphires. He let her breath to calm down a little, then he slipped his hand lazily under the light lace and sank his fingers in her. He watched her gaze becoming unseeing, her breath speeding up and breaking again, and from her lips came out a moan, which turned into a shriek when he brought her to the top with smooth, firm movements.

    When a wave of ecstasy rolled over her body, she whispered his name.

    Fascinated with satisfaction and sluggishness visible on her face, he bent down and bit into her wet lips. They both lost themselves in passionate kiss, enjoying the taste, the scent, the touch.

    - You’re wonderful! – He whispered into her parted lips, when he stopped the kiss for a second. – Like a dormant volcano which can explode at any moment.

    She laughed hoarsely and tucked her fingers with his. He didn’t have time to protest when she made a sudden move, rolled him on back and hung over him.

    - You don’t know me yet, Weakfield. – She said in sexy, provocative tone.

    She leaned forward and begun gently nibbling his lower lip with her teeth. He hissed when she bit him harder. She unbuttoned his shirt slowly relishing the pleasant warmth of his bare skin. She grabbed him by the wrists to feel the pulse, and when she felt it’s speeding up, she pinned his hands above his head. Seeing Bryan’s eyes, darkened with arousal, she began to move slightly, bringing him to the limits of endurance.

    He tried to release his hands, so he could touch her, but she didn’t let him. She brushed his lips, but when he raised his head to hold her mouth for longer, she moved lower. With the tip of her tongue she wrote on his body magical signs and symbols, known only for her. She got out one hand and began wandering along muscular shoulders, down to his wide chest. Here she stopped for a moment to feel the rhythm of his heart and match hers up with it. After a while she raised up, so she could watch his face while she resumed her wandering along flat, hard stomach.

    She found soft, narrow hairline leading down from the navel, she encountered trousers on her way and she gave an impatient moan. And when it turned out that she still has a belt to overcome, a grunt full of irritation came out of her throat. He smiled involuntarily. His head was humming, and blood was boiling in his veins. Each of her touches made him feel the thrill of pleasure bordering on pain. A thought that she shouldn’t knew so much about sex yet, crossed his mind, but it was drowned out when Jay broke through all the buckles, zips and buttons, and she slipped her hand under his boxer shorts.

    - Jaysabel! – He croaked in a slightly aching voice.

    She raised her head to look at him. Then he took the opportunity to take control again – he rolled her on back, took off her jeans with one quick movement and began to stroke the delicate lace. She rose up on elbows and looked him into eyes. She aroused him, provoked. He fulfilled her dumb request. He suddenly jerked off the black panties and lifted her hips. He leaned over, so he could see better all the emotions visible on her face.

    He wanted her so much, that it hurt. He entered her slowly, leaning lower and lower to join with her lips in a hot, greedy kiss. He felt her wrapping around his waist with her incredibly slim and strong legs and he lost control. She eagerly came to meet him when he begun rhythmically move inside her. He was furious, and he couldn’t resist it. And he didn’t want to. It was like a tumbling tide, almost like rough see waves, with which you can’t fight.

    ‘Like her eyes,’ he thought. ‘Good God! If I should die, then only by drowning in her eyes!’ He looked into those misty eyes, the color of the ocean’s anger, and he sank in them.

    Jay couldn’t resist not to look into Bryan’s mind, and what she saw terrified her. ‘He cannot fell in love with me!’ She thought frantically. ‘And I can’t hurt him!’ Then she felt what he felt. Insatiable desire. Tenderness filling up the heart. Overwhelming longing.

    She looked him in those beautiful amber eyes. Now darkened by desire and passion. She watched him closing them while flowing into the abyss. She had a lump in her throat and could feel burning under eyelids. She didn’t remember to close her eyes, but she knew she was looking with the eyes of her soul now. She could see herself with his eyes. Feel what he felt. And that scared her.

    When the first tear came out from under her closed eyelids, she stopped fighting and followed Bryan.

***

    She was awakened by the horn of the car passing by. As he breathed evenly, she knew Bryan was deep asleep. She lifted up on her elbow and stared at his calm face – he looked like a sleeping god of war. He lay on his stomach, his face turned towards her. His hair spread over the pillow forming soft waves. She tenderly brushed his cheek and gently kissed his lips. He moved, slightly stretched and turned to the side. Looking at him she already knew, she won’t fall asleep again, but she didn’t want to wake him up either. So she slipped out of the warm cover, grabbed his shirt and tiptoed to the bathroom.

    She stood under the stream of hot water and struggled with a growing sense of guilt. ‘How could I be so reckless?!’ She kept asking herself, but couldn’t find the answer to that question. What was between her and Bryan appeared suddenly and so unexpectedly, that she had no chance to defend herself. She couldn’t stop it. And now she knew as well, that she won’t be able to withdraw without hurting him. She’ll break his heart. She’ll destroy him. ‘You’re the only one to be blamed!’ She repeated angrily in her thoughts.

    She didn’t plan to fall in love, or arouse boy’s passion, especially, that he was her friend since they were kids. And especially now, when she found out more about her destiny. Although it was really hard, she already made decision. She’d chosen the path to follow. And this path is very hard, full of painful choices. And empty. There was no place for Bryan. Or anyone else.

    ‘The sooner you finish it, the better for him!’ She suddenly knew what to do. She made up her mind. All she had to do now was to preserve in her decision. At the thought that this is their last weekend, she felt pain in her heart. ‘That’s what you have to do. It will be better. And easier.’ She tried to convince herself. ‘Before things get too far.’ She put on Bryan’s shirt and noticed with satisfaction, that it’s soaked with his scent. Subtle aroma of his cologne and the smell of his skin. When she took a deep breath, she was able to recognize the aroma of cherries. Sweet, intoxicating. She shook off from thoughts, put her hair into a careless bun and went barefoot to the living room.

    Bryan still slept like a baby. She reached into her bag for black cotton panties, put them on quickly and went to the kitchen. Because recently she was a frequent guest here, she had no troubles to find what she needed. She turned on the coffee machine, took eggs and bacon out off the fridge and started preparing breakfast. To improve her mood she turned on the radio. She was lucky as they played only joyful tracks she knew well. Her good mood returned and she begun to sing as well.