2. Devil in Sunlight

Lifeless, that was how I feel right now, I have no willpower to get up from my bed, shivering due to the bad fever that I got at this moment, courtsy to the dreadful-GodPleaseSaveMe-dream last night. Hot liquid all over my face, ear, neck, and all over the pillow, my never-ending tears keep flowing for hours. I am too afraid to move, too anxious for what will I see down there, will there be blood seen?

I was wailing hard and crying nonstop... please... pleasee... let it be just a dream!! "I...I was dreaming right?" I asked my self, more to entertained my shattered feeling.... "Yess... it must be a dream...! There wouldn't be a ghost who rape human randomly in the middle of the night! No ghost can make a physical contact with human."

I was drained... totally drained... maybe because of the dream. But... I felt little sore down in my core... sticky... warm... but was it a dream?? How come?? ...lost in my thought a gain, trying to process everything... and after a minute I'm down and cry again... all the positive thought shattered....

Tired after crying for hours, sick of my dream... or so I called it... I fell asleep. I dreamt of the man again, a dark creature who had hunted my previous dream... why... oh why... I must see him again in this dream... this green-eyed devil who had raped me in dream with no mercy. I wouldn't forget his eyes... I hate the color with all my heart. He walks closer, while again... hate to admit it... I!m paralized... the only thing I can do is blinking. I see the surrounding, beautiful lavender field as far as my eyes could see... and he is still walking to where I stand. Lavender... my favorite flower, the beautiful sight suddenly contaminated due to the devil himself has stand in front of me.

He stand not far from me, close enough for me to see his eye without lifting my head. He smirks... this evil spirit dares to smirk! Never in my life would I love his face, for whatever thing he did to me.

"Laila... your wish is... making love with the one you love on the lavender field... right?" he asks me smiling, "I'll make it come true...."

I try to speak, but the only voice out is just a grunt. I glare with hate... I wish I could kill him with my glare.

Not the one I love, you damn evil... but my husband that I love whole-heartedly! And that wont be You!

"Sooner or later... Laila... I'll be the only one you love. There will be only me in your heart, and brain-in your every breath you take, it will be my name flooding your thought... my name... Blaze...."

I try to scream, but not working. I try again with all my might, I scream loud... too loud, till it ringing painfully in my ear. Slowly the evil figure dissapears, the field fading slowly and vanish.

My eyes opened and I see my white ceiling, I sit on my bed and realize I am in my boring moccha room, I remebered as my bedroom. Hitched breath and wierd, I feel wierd yet tired, feels like I had run a marathon, wierd because I feel no pain and sticky in my body. So... another dream. Good God... its a dream!

But... how come a dream feels like a reality? How and wahy I felt my body splitted into halves when he entered... no... no... I don't want to remember any of ìt...!

With my drumming hear-beat, I closed my eyes wishing for a dreamless sleep.

*** 

I'm awake when the sun light hit the acasia tree outside my window. I am awake lighter and happier. Happy because everything dreadfull lastnight was just a mere dream.

Today is my first day at Uni, after the tiresome orientation for a week. My smile broaden when I think about it again, finally Im at Uni. I eat my roasted bread which has been spread with peanut butter. Lusi, my little flirty sister called me a maniac, just because I smiled like a looney, but it wont make my good mood darken. I send her another megawatt smile, which made my brother Raja laughed crazily.

Raja goes to the same Uni as mine, he is 3 years older than me, while Lusi is separated by 4 years with me.

"So... the peanut butter changed in to pizza, hun?" Raja asked me with amused eyes. "Or... is it because a georgeus guy at Uni?"

"Maybe..." I answered bluntly. Not bothering the suspicious glances my siblings sent me. I am happy... yup... I! m happy cause I still have my virginity, I'm happy cause it was just a dream, a motion-sense-almost-real-dream, for I can feel everything in those dream.

"You better eat your breakfast, don't make your sister mad this early!" My mom shaking her head side to side, amused and mad at the same time hearing our morning banter. She put a jug of milk on the table, I love plain milk, while Raja mixed it with cocopandan syrup and Lusi prefers vanilla mixed milk.

Don't start asking about my Dad!! I have a father, yes, but I have no idea his whereabout, in his room maybe, or his office, or... somewhere, I really don't care about him. Since we were little, we lost the father figure, not because he is dead or something, but that sorry-exused of man has betrayed my mom and never care bout us. My mom knew it, but decided to survive the marriage because of her children especially Lusi, the last born.

I would prefer a divorce for my mom, cause my dad is getting worse everyday, gambling, going out with a slut and the worst is, his cursing at my Mom. My mom said, to be very carefull to choose our husband or wife later, personality and family background check is a must, and most important of all, do not be blinded by love. My mom used to love my dad eventhough her parents forbid their relationship, but see what happened later, my mom realized that love is not to be lost into, and she doesnt want her children have the same fate as hers.

My father never care of our family well-being, he didn't care bout the expenses, as we have been working to fulfill it. Mom works for a bakery down the street, while Raja works as his lecture's assistant and does a part time job at the computer store. While me, my mom never allowed me to work, she said I can work if ilI am accepted studying at Uni, now I am, so I'm looking forward applying for a job.

Afrer several goodbye--Lusi, Raja, and me--row our bike to our destination. Lusi separated after the second intersection while not long after Raja rows faster, because he is needed early for his classes, while me--I row leisurely--enjoying the relaxing green-yellow-red scenery of trees along the road.

I feel suffocated suddenly when I see a man walks toward me, all the happiness dissapear and replaced by fear. Here, in the parking lot, a man with all-black outfit frighteningly tall with unforgetable green eyes which shine brighter in the sun light. He stares deeply with lust and a slight smirk on his lips.

How in the world--the devil in my dream--now in the real world!!