Chapter 1 (The Wedding Which Never Happened)

Bell's POV

Flashback

 Everything seemed perfect, it felt like a dream. I wondered if everything happening around me was real. I was sitting on a chair, full on done with a big gorgeous gown which made my pale skin look fairer. My smile was non-fading, actually I didn't know how to stop it. The dream day of my life was finally here, I was finally going to marry love my life, I was finally going to be HIS. I was excited to see him in that handsome groom attire, waiting for me to hold his hand, to kiss me deeply and mark me with his name. How will he react after seeing? Will he keep acting all cheesy on dies? He is really fun type person and never stops teasing me, haha. He is so-

''Stop dreaming on him Bell. You are going to be smashed in his bed in few hours and you still keep dreaming about how cute he is! Trust me, men are hungry wolves in bed!'' My best friend, Jennifer said winking at me as I blushed at her words. Gosh, I am getting nervous, when will that damn ceremony will start.

''You look so pretty hun. Don't smile too much, people say it's a bad omen.'' My mother said pecking my forehead and I sighed.

''Mum, it's 21st century, you still in all that?'' I said being tired of mum's people say. But she didn't fight back with me this time, I look up and saw most common yet heart whelming scene which happens almost in every ceremony.

''Ah... Mum, don't c-cry...'' I said trying to gulp lump in my throat. Seeing her getting teary, my eyes couldn't stop the salty tears.

''I can't b-believe you are getting m-married. You were just this l-little few days ago...'' My said avoiding my daze. I got up and I hugged her, trying so strong to stop my tears. But you know, you just can't sometimes.

''I am gonna m-miss you mum.” I held her tighter as the moment felt so painful. Isn't it too unfair for girls? They grow up all these years as a princess with her king and queen and one day, you just have to go leaving all behind. It's not fair....

''Okay enough, I don't wanna ruin your make-up, okay? I don't want my daughter to look like a witch.'' My mum pulled out the same joke as I parted away with smile on face and tears in my eyes.

Yes, everything was going perfect, it seemed so heavenly but as my mum's people used to say. You shouldn't get happy too much or else something bad will happen. The merrier you will be, the more hard lightning will strike to you, and it did. Everything just turned upside down in blink of an eye as the White gown of my wedding turned gray leaving me an unmarried bride.

Flashback end.

When I put on my beautiful white dress on that time, I felt like a million dollars. I couldn't wait to become “HIS” wife. Not long as ago, I had my whole life planned out, crazy, isn't it? WE were there, and everybody was happy and excited, and he was late, I didn't think anything about it at first because he was kinda of always late. Late on our blind date, late on our a month anniversary, late on our almost every day, late on our dinner plans. He was a 'late' guy.

I kind of felt Nervous for some reason, so I tried to make light of the situation by joking with my family and friends. I was getting mad at him, how can he be late on such an important occasion? The waiting turned into minutes, minutes into hours until the guests were losing their patience.

 “Lee's cancelled the wedding!” The news spread like fire, making all people leave the place as the wedding hall turned into an abandoned desert. I still keep waiting for him, sitting on the aisle alone, hoping that he will come, but he never did. Nor did he answered my calls, nor his family answered my parents. My parents lost their respect, they lost their reputation they earned after all these years, they lost their pride but me? They broke not only my heart but whole me.

I became a one called “LEFT ALONE ON MY WEDDING DAY” Is it that how it feels like heart gets broken? I thought it was only a theoretical topic for cheesy lovers but God, why does it hurt so much? I feel like there's nothing left in my life anymore. I's feels like I am an unwanted left away bride and it makes me timid. I am afraid to see people. What will they talk about me? What they will think about me? What will they do with me?

How does those girls get over when “LEFT ALONE ON MY WEDDING DAY”? How does those girls get over the worst rejection on their face? So much rejection that you feel like you can't handle it anymore! It makes me destroy the desire of living.

The person I love most in the entire world has left me. Gone. Vanished and the real kicker folks says he left me by Choice. I was his mistake.

By that time it seemed to me, and my parents that he simply did not want to get married. I was Devastated and Humiliated beyond belief that I could have been left at the altar like that

“ I felt so torn”.

Every one know this, and yet they still say it's “His Loss”. As if that supposed to make me feel better, console me ; make me the 'bigger person'. It does none of the above because the truth of the matter is “I haven't experienced a loss of love but I experienced the bitter taste of trusting so blindly and loving so unconditionally.”

 I cried so much, locking myself in bathroom, sitting on the cold floor alone that I thought I would get dehydrated from all the water loss. I felt so tore and my heart was feeling with hatred for him but then night creeps in all I can think about is only Him. The fun things we did together, all those times we laughed and made love, I thought he loved me the same way as I did but just how could he throw me all away like that ? Doesn't he care about me at all? 

     “It's an Empty hole in my body that feels bottomless every passing second, which feels like it can never be filled”.