Chapter 34

As I rose from my heavy slumber, Ivo isn't here anymore. I checked the digital clock on my right, it's 8 pm.

I remember Ivo hugging me as I cried earlier. He stayed with me until I calmed down and fell asleep again.

Ramdam ko na medyo mabigat ang mga mata ko dahil siguro sa kakaiyak ko rin. My stomach growled, realizing I haven't eaten anything since this morning. Bumangon ako mula sa pagkakahiga, I took a shower before leaving the room. Medyo madilim ang hallway paglabas ko ng kwarto pero rinig na rinig ko ang tawa ni Nikolai.

"Ivo, don't I get hazard pay for putting up with Nikolai's shit? I deserve it, at least!" Severin wailed like a child.

They're all in the living room, Ivo is sitting while he rubbed his temples. "What happened this time, Severin?" kalmadong tanong ni Ivo.

Polina is reading her book at patuloy pa rin ang pagtawa ni Nikolai. "Nik killed a few men from the Costa Mafia when I specifically told him not to, and he ruined my limited edition shirts!"

"Did you really think I'd listen, Sev? Those assholes were asking for it, and I did them a favor." Nikolai said while shaking his head at Severin.

Severin glared at him, "You could have helped me clean the bodies!"

"You know I don't do well with the sight of blood." Nikolai hugged himself and shivered.

"For someone who kills for a living, you shouldn't be saying that," Polina said quietly, flipping to the next page of her book. Nikolai looked at her mula sa dulo ng couch kung saan sila nakaupong dalawa.

"Aww, come on, babe. You're supposed to make me feel okay. I was scared, you know." Nikolai pouted like a child. Severin rolled his eyes at sight, and Ivo kept his silence as he listened to his friends.

Hindi pinansin ni Polina si Nikolai, tumigil sya sa pagbabasa para tignan si Ivo. She looks serious, "He had to do it, Ivo. Things are hitting up, and we can't afford to wait anymore. You have to remember our mission."

Mission?

Ivo only looked at her for a brief second and turned to face Nikolai, "We can't afford to have a confrontation with the Costa Mafia now." Simpleng sabi ni Ivo. Sumeryoso silang lahat. "I thought we all agreed to buy me some time? Until I get things right. "

"While you're buying yourself some time, we're running out of it." Dagdag ni Severin. They all look dead serious, and there's tension in the air.

Ivo rubbed his temples again, "Give me another week. Let me tell her at least."

Nikolai and Severin sighed and nodded, but Polina stayed silent.

"Just a week. That's ---", Ivo didn't finish his sentence because he noticed me.

I smiled awkwardly, did he see me eavesdropping? Nikolai mentioned the Costa Mafia, did they have a clash for him to kill some of its men?

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you guys. I will go back---" I turned, about to leave when Polina spoke.

"Stay, Skyla." Her book is closed, and she's looking at me. Should I stay?

At the mention of the Costa Mafia, it reminded me of the task Detective Michaels asked me. I haven't told Ivo about it, and I don't think it's a good idea to tell him. I volunteered for the undercover job under my own volition because I wanted to uncover the truth behind my parent's death.

I have a feeling that Ivo will stop me, kaya hindi ko sasabihin. Instead, I'll use this chance to gather some information about Costa Mafia.

Ngayon alam ko nang nasa Mafia sina Severin, Polina, at Nikolai. Base sa kinuwento sa akin ni Ivo mukhang sya ang susunod na boss ng Moretti Mafia, and that saddens me, ngayong alam ko ng ayaw nya talagang mamuno at gusto lamang ng normal na buhay.

He probably saw the sad look on my eyes because he's on his feet now, he walked towards me and hugged me right away. "It's okay. Don't look at me like that." Niyakap ko sya pabalik sa bewang at hinalikan nya ako sa ulo.

"Why the fuck am I surrounded by couples? Malaking sana all." Sigaw ni Severin at naramdaman ko ang pag-init ng pisnge ko. Ivo and I are not a couple though.

Tawang-tawa naman si Nikolai at inasar si Severin, "Severin will be a virgin forever. Sucks to be you."

"I swear to God, I will kill you one of these days." He glared at Nikolai.

"Oh yeah? I don't think you can." He smirked at Severin.

Polina sighed at halata sa mukha nyang naiirita na siya, "You'll both be dead before you could kill each other." She threatened them.

Nikolai whistled, "Damn, baby. You really turn me on when you're angry."

I watched them bicker, nakayakap pa rin ako kay Ivo. Ewan ko ba parang ayoko na umalis sa mga bisig nya. Tinignan ni Polina si Nikolai with a bored look on her face, she then flipped her middle finger at him. "Fuck off, Nick."

"Severin, have you called Dr. Tan?" tanong ni Ivo. Tumingala ako mula sa dibdib ni Ivo para tignan sya.

"Yeah, he will be here in an hour."

Ivo nodded, "We'll have your chip removed."

Bumitiw ako sa pagkakayakap ko sa kanya, "Talaga?" He nodded at me. I'm thrilled, I don't want this chip inside me. I want freedom from my Uncle's grasp.

"Then, my Uncle knows I'm here," I stated, wanting to punch myself—Paano kung pumunta sya ditto at kaladkarin ako pauwi.

"Yeah, most likely. You don't need to worry, Skyla. This is the Moretti Mafia's land, I don't think your Uncle is stupid." Ani ni Nikolai.

Tumango ako, relieved at what Nikolai said. I looked at them, "I can't believe you are all from the Mafia." ani ko. Well, sinabi na ni Sel sa akin yun sa Charity Ball pero hindi ko masyadong pinansin ang impormasyon na iyon dahil they all looked ordinary people to me, plus they're all friendly.

'Maybe they belong to the 'Nice Mafia,' is there such thing?' I thought to myself.

"Oh, no, darling. Don't look at us like that." Severin said, habang umiiling sa akin.

"Huh? What look?" pagtataka kong tanong kay Severin.

"You have this look on your face, 'well, mabait naman sila sa akin, so it's probably okay.'" Ani naman ni Nikolai.

"Is that a bad thing?" I asked nervously.

"Yeah, it is. We're here because of Ivo. We are loyal to him. Only to him, and you're here because of him, Skyla." She paused and looked at me with her almond eyes, "We're not your friends, and we're not your enemies either. Also, we might fail one of our biggest mission because you're around."

Well, so much for thinking I could be friends with them pero tama si Polina. Nandito ako dahil kay Ivo. Niligtas ako ni Severin dahil kay Ivo. Polina helped me because of Ivo. Nikolai is also kind to me because of Ivo. Pero anong ibig sabihin ni Polina? Am I an inconvenience? Oh, of course, I am. Kakasabi nya lang eh.

"Polina, stop." Ani ni Ivo, he glared at her, but she glared back at him.

"You're slowing Ivo down, and in the process, he's slowing us down because of you." Dagdag nya pa. "I told him to leave you after we have your chip removed."

"Hey, Pol. That's enough." Severin says, he offered an apologetic smile on my direction, but nothing can take away what I'm feeling.

Ivo tensed at what Polina said.  Ako? Pakiramdam ko ay may samaksak sa akin. Yeah, I get it, pero masakit pa rin. I probably have this sad look on my face because Nikolai offered a sad smile.

"We're bad people, Skyla. It's not good to be mixed with us." May kahulugan ang mga sinabi nya at tingin kay Ivo. Tinignan ko si Severin pero nag-iwas sya ng tingin sa akin. Nanatiling tahimik si Polina at pinapanood kami.

Tinignan ko si Ivo, if I am such a hindrance, then why is he not telling me? Bakit galing sa mga kaibigan nya? Is that why he's asking for a week? Is this what they meant? Then if I'm slowing him down, why is he helping me? Hindi naman sya obligado.

I stepped back, finally understanding something. I nodded, how do I respond to that? I looked at Ivo, "Is this your way of telling me to stay away from you?" Hindi sya sumagot pero nakuha ko ang sagot mula sa ekspresyon ng mga mata nya.

Nanatili akong nakatayo sa harap ni Ivo. I glared at him, "Forget it." Ani ko. Saka ako lumabas ng bahay. Hindi ako iiyak. Hindi ako iiyak.

Paano ba ako makakabalik sa city? Kaya ko bang lakarin mula dito? Wala ako dalang pera, wala rin akong smartphone, at wala rin akong sasakyan.

I could go back inside and ask one of them to grab me an Uber or something, pero may pride is stopping me. Bakit ako babalik do? Eh napahiya na ako. Ang mas masakit pa ay hindi man lang halos nagsalita si Ivo.

He didn't correct Polina, so it's true then? I'm slowing him down, but I've never asked for his help or anything. Yeah, I am thankful, he saved my life after all. If he wasn't there at the Charity Ball, I could be dead by now. He also saved me when I got kidnapped, but I didn't ask for his help. Bakit parang kasalanan ko pa?

Hindi pa ako nakakalayo ng may humawak sa braso ko, he grabbed me forcefully, "Where are you going?" he asked.

Bumitiw ako sa pagkakahawak nya sa braso ko, "I'm going home, Ivo."

"Ihahatid kita bukas. It's late, Skyla. Come on, let's get inside." He coaxed, hahawakan nya sana ang kanang kamay ko pero lumayo ako sa kanya.

"I don't understand, Ivo." Tinignan ko sya sa mata. "Why are you doing this?"

"I'll explain. Let's get inside first." Tumingin sya sa paligid. "It's cold too. I don't want you to get sick." There's an urgency on his voice, and his tone is pleading.

I shook my head, "No, sa simula pa lang hindi na ako welcome dito. Polina made it clear na tinutulungan lang ako ng mga kaibigan mo dahil sayo. Tell me, Ivo. Ano ba ako sayo?"

There's a sad look on his face, and that broke my heart. "I want you safe."

"Hindi yan yung sagot na hinahanap ko, Ivo. I need more than 'I want you safe'. Hindi ka obligado panalitiin akong ligtas." Matapang kong sagot sa kanya.

"Your life is in danger, Skyla. I can keep you safe." Humakbang sya palapit sa akin.

I stepped back, "I didn't ask you to."

There's frustration now on his eyes, "Come on, Skyla."

Umiling ako sa kanya, "You're doing all of these for what, Ivo?" I whispered. "You can't keep on doing things like this. I still don't understand it myself, but I do like it when you're near, when I'm on your arms, however, if you're going to leave me at some point, I want to do it first, please." My voice quivered. "You can't do things like this and expect me not to feel anything. That's unfair." 

He and I are from different worlds. He belongs in the Mafia and I belong elsewhere although hinahanap ko pa kung saan iyon. Sabi ni Polina wag kong saktan si Ivo pero bakit ako yung mas nasasaktan ngayon?

"Skyla, please." His voice broke, but I turned my heels to leave. If I stay any other minute, I don't think I'd have the courage to leave. I am safe around him, but my heart isn't. 

I walked away without looking back. Ivo didn't follow me, and I'm thankful, I don't think I can face him right now without being all angry and sad. I had enough already.

            Hindi ko alam kung ilang oras ako naglakad. Masakit na ang mga paa ko pero hindi ako titigil hanggat hindi ako makakarating sa destinasyon ko. Nang makita ko ang pamilyar na eskinita ay agad akong nagtungo dito.

Hindi nalalayo ang bahay nila ditto. I don't know what time it is pero I badly need a place to stay and rest. I'm not planning to go back to Ivo's penthouse again, and I am not planning to go back to my Uncle's house. Anthony is not an option din.

My apartment is not a smart choice too kasi hanggang ngayon ay hindi pa rin ako pwedeng bumalik doon at sa tingin ko ay hindi din ako magiging komportable sa lugar kung saan may natagpuang parte ng isang bangkay. Isa pa, Kev and I are neighbors, mas lalong hindi ako komportableng bumalik sa unit ko.

I didn't hesitate. Kumatok ako sa pinto ng tatlong beses. I can hear movements from the other side of the door. It's probably late now, and they're wondering kung sino ang kakatok ng ganitong oras.

When the door opened, Jake was surprised to see me; he even rubbed both of his eyes to make sure his eyes are not deceiving him, "Ate Skyla?"

I grinned at him, "Hi, Jake. Long time no see."

The last time I saw him was during his sister's birthday. I wonder how Tasha is. After Anthony dragged me out of Jake's house, I didn't get the chance to meet him and his friends again.

He looked at me from my head to foot. "Okay ka lang, Ate Skyla?"

I forced myself to smile. I don't think it will be a good idea to tell him what happened, so I decided to make up a lie, "Yeah, I am. I know it's sudden, but can I stay here for a night? Medyo may tampo kasi ako sa pamilya ko."

"Jake, isara mo na yang pinto. Sino ba yang kausap mo at anong oras na oh?!" ani ng nanay ni Jake. We both heard her steps, maingay kasi ang bakya na suot nya.

"Hala! Ma'am Skyla, anong nangyari sayo?!" ani ng nanay ni Jake. She wasn't expecting to see me at this hour looking homeless. Well, I am probably.

"Good evening po." Ani ko sa kanya.

"Hala, pasok ka." Tumango ako sa kanya, "Jake, kuha mo nga ng tubig si ate Skyla mo." Utos nya. 

Agad tumungo sa kusina si Jake para kumuha ng isang basong tubig. Pinaupo ako ng nanay ni Jake sa upuan, "Ano bang nangyari sayo at bakit ganyan ang itsura mo?" tanong nya sa akin.

"Nadapa lang po."

"Huh? Nadapa?!" gulat na tanong ni Jake.

Well, that's true. Sumubsob naman talaga ako sa kalsada na may maraming bato kaya ito ngayon ang itsura ng balat ko. Masyadong malayo ang nilakad ko at hindi pa rin ako kumakain. I probably look half-dead to them.

Hindi na ako nagpaliguy-ligoy, "Pwede po ba akong manatili ditto ngayong gabi?"

Nagkatinginan ang mag-ina. Alam kong gusto pa nila akong tanungin, but then my stomach growled. I smiled awkwardly at them, "Pwede rin po bang makikain?"

"Oo, naman. Teka at maghahain ako." Jake's mom left immediately.

I smiled at Jake, "I'm sorry, Jakey. Alam kong hindi masyadong maganda yung huli nating pagkikita."

"It's okay, Ate Skyla. Your boyfriend was probably worried." Umismid ako when he said 'boyfriend' at alam ko kung sino ang tinutukoy nya. Walang iba kundi si Anthony.

"He's not my boyfriend. He is..." I paused, after what happened at the restaurant, ano nga ba si Anthony sa akin? Is he still the man I considered as a brother? I chewed my lower lip before answering him, and I said, "He was family." Was.

"Skyla, hija. Halika, at kumain para kang hihimatayin sa itsura mong bata ka." Tumayo ako at nagpunta sa kusina, "Alam kong hindi ka sanay sa mga ganitong pag kain pero pilitin mo para naman magkalaman yang tiyan mo."

Hinawakan nya ang balikat ko, she gestured for me to sit on the chair. Nilatag nya ang plato sa harap ko at nilagyan nya ito ng kanin at ulam. "Jake, kumuha ka nga ng isang panali."

Hinawakan nya ang buhok at sinuklay ito, "Kumain ka ng marami. Pagkatapos, maghilamos ka ng katawan, at matulog para makabawi ka ng lakas." Ani niya at tinali ang buhok ko.

My eyes started to water, but I blinked them away. I ate everything she prepared. Jake and his mom were both watching me as I devoured everything, kulang nalang ay kainin ko rin yung plato.

"Gusto mo pa, hija?" tanong nya sa akin.

"Yes po," I beamed at her. Jake is lucky to have a mom like her. She gladly added more rice and viand. Jake was smiling at me and gave me a thumbs up. I made the right choice of coming here. 

But the thought didn't leave my mind until I fell asleep that night, 'It would be nice if I have a mom too.' 

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