Chapter 21: Glimpse of His Past

Some said that he killed many people on impulse. But Jonathan did not care whether it was right or wrong. He supported Troy’s words, “All the good women have been spoiled by us!”

At Crystal's funeral, Jonathan looked out at her gravestone from a distance. Many people mourned her, but no one knew who he was. When he saw the strange name carved on the tombstone, he remembered that she had said her real name wasn’t Crystal.

After the crowd had dispersed, Jonathan put a large bunch of red spider lilies on her tombstone and said to her with a smile, “I love you! I will marry you tomorrow! No, today...I will miss you and will never forget you. When he looked at her photo, she seemed to laugh so sweetly.

As Jonathan was about to leave, a man in a black suit stopped him. It took him a long time to gather his thoughts but remembered the man. “Are you Jonathan Li?” the man asked.

“Yes, I am,” Jonathan replied.

“Can we talk?” he asked.

“Alright,” Jonathan said.

That day, after the man had spoken to him, he realized that he didn't understand Crystal at all. She was not sitting around doing nothing. She had a major in music and was a sophomore at a prestigious university.

Her purpose for going to the bar to play the piano was not to make money but to figure out whether her melodies would refresh the minds of those whose lives were corrupted with money and all sorts of other things.

She was talented, once embracing the opportunity to study further in Vienna as an exchange student, but she gave up before going abroad, saying, “I just want to stay with the person I love, even if he doesn’t know my true name.”

She also had a strong character. Among the countless men chasing her, this man was one of them. The man was fascinated by her temperament and talent, having pursued her for two years. The first thing she said to the man, “Hey... Lend me your arm and I will give it back later.” Then, she took him by the arm and walked across the room.

When Jonathan drove away, she squatted and cried for an entire afternoon. The man said to her, “He doesn't care about you at all. If he cared, he would stop you and talk to you.”

She responded, “No matter how hard I try, I don't understand the meaning of his bloody life and so-called brotherhood! I do not understand that he chooses to bury his life in darkness, even though he can understand my English, and he can recite all the provisions of criminal law and procedural law. The only thing I know is that our encountering is doomed to have a tragic ending. Sooner or later, I will die for him, but I am still willing to stay with him. I know he is a good man!”

By the time Jonathan finished his story, my tears had already wet the hair on my pillow. “Are you awake?” he asked. He spoke so softly that I could hardly hear him. I didn't answer because I was thinking about a question. What kind of man was Jonathan? Why would a cruel man obtain Crystal’s unregretful love until death?

“It seems that my story was too boring,” he said. Then he covered me gently with the duvet, leaning over to kiss me on the forehead tenderly.

As time went by, second by second, I thought he was gone, but there was still a strong sense of his presence. When I wanted to open my eyes, his breath blew on my face. I was too scared to open my eyes until his lips touched mine!

Just a kiss, but it stirred all the nerves in my brain, my whole body became paralyzed with all ten of my fingers grasping the duvet tightly, avoiding any sound. It was not until I heard the door close that I sat up, breathing hard, my chest pounding.

I comforted myself, it was just a goodnight kiss to a daughter from her father, different from a lover’s kiss in a romantic novel, but it was the first time that he kissed me. The shock the following day was far less than that kiss.

I stayed up all night, tossing and turning, my mind was buzzing with various questions. I was confused about why brutal Jonathan was so gentle towards me. I couldn't figure out why he insisted that people teach me to play the piano. I couldn't figure out what his kiss meant.

What’s more. For the first time, he mentioned his elder brother, Harvey, and his stepfather, Officer Marcel. Why had I never seen or heard him talk to anyone about these two people who meant so much to him?

Besides, his description of the woman. Somehow, I think that her personality was very similar to mine! “And what was the truth?” I wondered. Countless scenes went through my mind until I had a splitting headache.

Crystal did not understand Jonathan. Neither did I and I had been growing up around him for several years. “Why did he hide so deeply?” I thought as I stayed up till morning. Looking at the black circles under my eyes in the mirror, I got a new school uniform from the wardrobe and got dressed and went downstairs.

I prayed for Jonathan, then I heard his voice just after walking downstairs, “Desiree?” My heartbeat stopped for a moment and I raised my head, "Good morning! I am going to school,” I said.

“I have asked for a week's leave for you. You need to rest at home,” Jonathan said.

“I'm fine,” I said. I'd rather go to school and talk to my friends than face him at home.

He came over and put his arm around my shoulder. He noticed the dark circles under my eyes and asked, “Didn’t you have a good rest last night?”

“Not really,” I said to him.

"Come and see,” he said as he called me over to him. He showed me the newspaper, the headline said that a well-known pianist was coming the next day. “Shall we go to enjoy the concert?” Jonathan asked me.

I raised my head in shock, looking at the side of his face. Time seemed to treat him well, leaving no mark on him, turning him into a composed and calm man from a frivolous and impetuous youth he had once been. He had grown into a man who could treat a woman considerately and gently.

“Desiree? What's the matter with you?” he wanted to know.

“Why are you so kind to me?” I asked him.

He adopted me and took good care of me. When I broke my leg, he sucked the dirty blood and cleared the hurt for me. When I fell asleep, he turned off the light and covered me with the duvet. He said that he believed in me, cared about me and would do anything for me. I didn't understand why he was so kind to me.

He held my face to show him, “I am so kind to you, it is because...” As his voice faded and his lips moved closer to my lips, I remembered an important thing, I was concentrating on his answer so much that I forgot to avoid his kiss! It seemed that he had given me a long time to avoid it, I did not seize it!