LOGINMy voice sounds low and broken. Yours, however, sounds calm.
"For two years, honey, John and I live only an hour and a half away from the boarding school. That's the good thing, you can come every weekend, or I come to visit you."
My thoughts gather again. My eyes rise and a new question is on the tip of my tongue.
"Wait a minute, if John lives in Arizona, how does he get here every day?"
I feel like doing a jigsaw puzzle where no piece fits together.
"When we met a few months ago, he was here on a business trip and then we kept talking on the phone and he came over and rented a hotel room where he has been living for a month now. It worked out well for him because he still has a lot here He really wants us to come with him and your situation makes it a very good fit. "
I don't have the right words. Should i be angry? It is her right not to give up everything for me completely, it would be selfish to blame her for it. I must never forget that she would give her life for me, I know that without a doubt. I don't know what to tell her. So I'm ending this here. I get up from the sofa. With one last sentence I say goodbye for today.
"Mum it was a long day and tomorrow will be even longer, I just want to sleep until tomorrow."
With a slight sad nod I let her stand and go up to my room exhausted, where I fall to bed exhausted from the day. What should I do? Nothing? I can't do anything, I'm powerless ...
Mum said yes, it is not in her power, then I'll be the last one who can do something about it ...
I have to accept it as it is. Just see the whole thing positively. I don't like John very much, but when I'm in boarding school, at least Mum isn't that alone. I might even make good friends, after all, they're just like me ... vampires. I fall asleep in the middle of the train of thought.
The loud clink of the alarm clock echoes through the small room. The annoying noise rudely pulls me out of my dreams. An annoyed groan escapes me when I try to open my eyes.
Today is the day, today is the big day. Today begins a new chapter in my life. It's so inconceivable that it was last night in my old house. With one vigorous movement, I throw my blanket on the floor and jump out of bed. A light gust of wind from the blanket that lands on the floor brushes my lower legs. Most of the things that we rarely use or that we no longer need stay here.
(My mother's friend takes care of the things and the sale of the house, suburb).
I slowly get dressed and put the last things I need in my handbag. I look out of my window one last time until I leave the room and close the door to my childhood forever. A new section is now beginning and I am ready to face it with my head held high.
Downstairs, in front of the first step, I see a good-humored mum. She hugs her loved one with a smile. Puke. Next to her is a smiling John who gently strokes her arm. WHAT? John and smile ??? I think the world is upside down.
"Well, honey, are you ready? Can you go?"
Mum asks me lovingly. With hope and despair in view. I force a small smile and nod in agreement.
"Then let's finally drive off."
John spoke up. And in the same breath pushes open the front door. The way out of the house seems endless. One last time I look at the building that I know inside out, until my eyes follow John. He gets in his car, Mum and I go over to ours. Now the long journey begins.
But it is shorter than I imagined, because after a good half an hour we drive to the airfield, where we come to a stop. I do not understand? What are we supposed to do here?
"Mum, I thought we were going there ?!" I emphasize the word drive. "Yes, I was planning to, but John thought it would be more pleasant to take the plane."
Around four o'clock at night I am torn from my dream world by dull noises that come from below into the room illuminated by the moon. Mum and John are sure to be on their way. I can still hear her whispering and I can also hear Conner's voice, didn't he get up to say goodbye? The words cannot be understood by my drowsy mind. Yawning, I straighten up in bed and let my good and bad side argue in my head about whether I should get up again to say goodbye to both of them. Or rather let me fall back into bed and snuggle up under the cozy blanket again. Since my good side is too tired to fight, the bad side wins a battle that has not started. My body sinks down onto the warm, wrinkled sheet. The eyelids contract again. I'll take care of the spell, don't worry. Are these really Conner's words? What is that supposed to mean? What spell? And it's getting dark again. My dreams peacefully fill the rest of the night, as always, I dream of him, whoever he may be. The bright rays of the sun that
Notices Conner. The impassive head was in his crossed arms, which are resting on the table."Discuss less than you tell my son."John answers with a slight smile. Ooh dear, if John smiles it doesn't mean a good thing. One of my brows goes up, tense and skeptical. My body tenses and seeks eye contact with my mother."Mum."I address her in a threatening voice. But she still doesn't look at me. Her eyes move a little frantically in John's direction. What's wrong with her. She wriggles back and forth in her chair, acting like a child who has broken something. Then John pushes his hand to my mother's and asked a question in a lowered voice that we can hear."Do you want or should I be my love?"I look at the picture in front of me. I keep my arms crossed in front of my chest. Something is wrong. What do they have to say? They shouldn't excite us so much and
It has now been three weeks. I got used to the house. It is beautiful here. I don't think it's so bad living under one roof with John either. He usually leaves me alone. Conner has proven to be a good friend and even better teacher. He taught me in such a short time to keep my thirst under control. Everyone was thrilled that I managed to hold back a little so quickly. I have to admit that Conner's method of inviting women home almost every day has worked for me. Even if he didn't think of me first when he was invited. He told me it was a win win situation. We have even been outside among people, just briefly so as not to overstrain our luck. I was so happy to get out again, even if I'm only allowed out with observation, I think it's great. Since I don't have any friends here, except for Conner, I'm very happy if he finds time for me. It was fascinating, I could stand against the desire and control myself. I found it difficult to concentrate because the sweet smell of blood stung my
`` My mother died about 40 years ago. I also had nothing to do with my father for a long time because I just wanted to be to myself after her death. He quickly found a new wife whom he married after 10 years. I hated him for forgetting my mother so quickly. You have to understand, when you have such a long life, time goes differently. 10 years are nothing. I found out that she became pregnant. It was mean of me that I didn't even want to see the little one. Then they had another child. And my hatred grew over time. I sank formally in it. I hated them all. This woman, these children, and especially my father, who simply built a new family for himself after swearing his love to my mother centuries ago. My only wish was that they all die. But when I heard that my father's new wife had actually died. I felt dirty. I wanted her death from the start. I understood that she wasn't the cause of my anger. About a year after her death, I pulled myself together and went to my father. It was bro
Sorry little one, that's not how it was meant, sit down on the sofa, I'll just get dressed and then we can talk."His voice is suddenly very gentle and serious. He's like a changed man. His hand comes off me and he points to the black sofa that is in front of the window. I do what he says and sit down. He quickly digs a few items of clothing out of his chest of drawers and quickly disappears behind a door. It must lead to his bathroom. My body is still very tense. It calms down a bit when he comes back wearing a gray t-shirt and dark jeans. He sits down next to me at some distance."So what's on your mind?"He rests his elbows on his knees. I feel his eyes scrutinize me and seek contact with mine. I'm slowly feeling more comfortable around him again. Now that he's wearing something and it seems that he really wants to get into a normal conversation with me. I start with my request."I just had a few
Only when I got up from the meadow did I notice all the dead people around me, all of them were covered in blood and I understood that it was my work. My hands were smeared with blood, the white dress I was wearing on my body was covered with red spots and I could still taste the blood on my lips, the metallic, slightly salty and yet sweet taste. The sweet smell was in the air and I enjoyed it. I enjoyed it? Isn't that really me? No it was just a stupid dream, I'll learn and I'll control myself, I'll make it. I am not going to kill anyone. I promise myself that no one will ever die for my thirst. I know I can do it!There is a knock on the door, which opens immediately. My mother peeks in. When she sees that I'm awake, she walks into the room."Hello Darling."Like an angel, she slides over and sits down on the bed with me. Without another word, she hugs me tightly. The tears are rolling down my cheeks and I can't stop it. Again I can