41. Not Her

It was a powerful thing running with a pack something we have never done before. Aurora lead at Anubis side she couldn’t of been happier. Everything felt perfect I had a mate a pack more then I ever could asked for. The Lycian half of me was everything it could possibly be, but the side of me that I knew almost nothing about, the part of me one would think was good and full of light I have come to learn holds the darker side of me. A power I can’t control, a past life that was shrouded in death rebellion, love, and desire. Yet at its core I feel like I would do it all again. I would do anything to keep Azrael in my life. If I truly believe this past life stuff I already did what more can one do then defy God himself for a the one you love.

“I would do it all again to Little Wolf nothing will keep you from me.”

Azrael came up from behind me wrapping his arms around my waist and stomach, resting his head on my shoulder. We had been offered the Alphas quarters at the pack house but opted to stay in small one room cabin just off in the woods near by. I stood on the small porch watching the sun come up from behind the trees. After a night of running I felt tired Aurora was silent sense we shifted back she was completely content and at peace I have never felt her so happy. It made me smile.

“You know Azrael this one sided mind link is kind of unfair I can’t hear what you are thinking unless you want me to, but for you I’m just an open book.”

I turn my head to look at him he just smiles.

“I’m happy to”

He say as he runs soft kisses down my neck.

“As happy as you are now I know you have many more questions. I noticed during the dance you had a memory. Have you been having many?”

This was something I wasn’t ready to discuss with him yet till I had a better picture but I don’t have control over the memories they come when they please, but this latest one left completely dumbfounded. I turned to face him.

“I have had dreams some vivid like I was actually there some just flashes. Was my name really Metadriel?”

Azrael held my face between his hands his eyes closed and a small grin appeared on lips.

“I called you my Melody. I remember like it was yesterday.”

“I’m not her!”

I’m not sure what really came over me but I was sick of being compared to her. I continue my rant letting go if everything I have been holding in

“I didn’t do those things she did. Your Melody died. I'm Solaris your Little Wolf I can’t live up to this person you all want me to be. I have a few memories but they are not mine they are hers. I dont love Lucifer I didnt sleep with the devil.”

I felt the tears fall from my eyes it was just to much this other side of me felt dark.

“You was never dark you did everything for the people you love and you loved him to. He was also part of you. You belong to us both. You can’t tell me you don’t feel like a part of you is missing.”

“A part of me has been missing sense I was sixteen Azrael. It’s not a new feeling for me. From the night I lost my parents for a moment I felt peace with you I need only you. The more we head down this path to bring back these past life memories the more I want to turn back. What’s the end game to all of this? Free Lucifer, get revenge on heaven build a new world. Where do you plan to build this new world Azrael. In heaven on Earth? Cause as far as I can tell there is already life here.”

Anger spread over his face and he stepped back from me.

“YES! I want you to remember everything. I want you to feel everything. I want you to get angry. I want you to fight with me. I want you to remember our brother who gave up everything for us to have a life that was are own. I want you to remember our story our pain and are happiness. I want to share that life with you. I want you to see the world for what it really is. And YES I want revenge on heaven! For taking our child, my brother, and you from me. I can’t do any of it with out you and with out Lucifer we are stronger together. When all your memories come back you will not fight me on this.”

He turned and walked away from me off in to the woods. Ending the conversation I didn’t even get a chance to answer him. That I agreed. I just needed to vent but also he needs to see I’m not that person I’m me. That I would follow him anywhere fight next to him in any battle.

We had much more to deal with then our little fight brought up. Like who’s behind these attacks. What other spell has bound my abilities. And I guess now how we free Lucifer I hope to have those past life memories back before that happens. I still had much to learn about that life. And apparently a lot to learn about the world. Which is no surprise when you spend your life running and hiding. I was to tired to keep thinking so I went inside to try And get some much needed rest. Worried about Azrael I try to reach out to him to no avail why is this shit only one way it’s so frustrating. So I fought to sleep only to fall into another dream or rather a memory.

“Lucifer control your pet before I burn her alive.”

Azrael was holding my arms behind my back trying to keep me contained and from murdering Lucifer’s new creation. She was supposed to be Adams first wife but Lucifer couldn’t help his self. Always interfering in father’s creations any chance he got to destroy his plans he didn’t hesitate. This time it happened to be Lilith. Sometimes I wish he would just leave it alone, but he says until he releases me he will never stop.

“Calm my Melody she has only just been reborn she dose not know her place.”

I could here the grin in Azrael's voice he was having fun with my aggravation and bit of jealousy.

“Her place is in the pit with rest of Lucifer’s failures. She will quickly Learn I don’t share what’s mine and you both belong to me!”

“Ouch Love I didn’t know you thought of me as such a failure.”

Lucifer stood in front of me with the same stupid grin I knew Azrael had on his face.

“You know what I mean now let me go so I can show your toy her place.”

Azrael released me only for Lucifer to grab me he held my arms in place as he wrapped his arm around me. My back to his chest I was looking at Azrael now and just like I thought stupid grin. I wiggled and writhed trying to get free.

“Melody you know no matter how much she flirts or touches she will never have us now calm she’s only a child.”

He was right I stilled and slumped In Lucifer’s arms.

“How would I know I can’t always get away I’ll have been gone to long already they will soon noticed my absence. What will happen when she’s left alone with both of you I will never be able to stop thinking about it.”

"My love know she is only a toy a puzzle piece on are path to creating an army. We are yours our hearts and body's are at your mercy and only you." Lucifer whispered these words to me my mind and body taking me back to our nights of dark pleasures. His hand slowly moving down by body. Only to interrupted when she showed up again walked over to Azrael and ran her fingers down his cheek he took a step back and I could see his eyes grow wide.

“Yes run back to your silver city I’ll take care of the men theirs is no need for you anymore. They have me and I will never have to leave them.”

That’s it I had it I started to push the light from my hand this bitch was dead. In a split second Lucifer let me go Azrael appeared in front of me grab my arms and we disappeared. As he cared me way my last vision was her wrapping her arms around Lucifer as he tried to shield her from the fire a huge smirk on her face.