Chapter 6

Natalie did finally fall asleep after crying over the letter Amber had from her future that didn’t become her future. It hurt Natalie reading something so personal but she wouldn’t treat Amber any different that woman deserves someone better than her. She may be in love with her at first sight, it wouldn’t be enough for her to stay too long. Natalie woke up from her nap three hours later realizing that she is hungry but as her husband called her fat she didn’t know how Amber would handle such awful feelings. It would cause her bad anxiety and depression because he didn’t see her as beautiful, the way Amber looks at her.

Making her way downstairs Natalie seeing Amber in the living room. Natalie felt bad for ditching her for several hours also snooping through her room but their was more to her that Natalie needed to know. Amber offered to feed me then went onto a sensitive subject that we both interjected with the beauties of our bodies though unfortunately Natalie couldn’t answer Amber on as to why she hated her body. She cried in Amber’s arms though her big breasts were soft pillows against my small ones. We looked at each other after Natalie let out a good cry but Amber backed away then sat back down. Natalie did finally eat my salad and began to eat more progressively through meaty meals that Amber would make, we didn’t care about how we look, we just loved food and it made us happy. Three days later, Natalie realized that she did gain some weight but not enough to affect her as a person.

After settling into routine for the past week, Natalie had to do something she knew would be hard to tell Amber but Sheila has been over and encouraging her to tell Amber everything for the sake of each other. It took Natalie a couple of hours to warm to the idea of how to tell Amber that she is married to a man who hates her as the person she is and is waiting for him to sign the papers since they were sent out a few days ago prior to being settled. Taking a deep breath Natalie went to Amber’s study which is a few doors down from her room with a slight knock.

“Come in, Natalie.” Amber said in a quiet voice.

Natalie walked into the study to find Amber consumed into her notebook writing with such progress it took her breath away.

“Can I speak with you?” Natalie replied feeling very nervous.

“Natalie, we are friends, so yes, of course.” Amber responded as she closed her notebook and clicked her pen setting down on the notebook.

“I know about Sarah. I am sorry for you losing her that is why you are so closed up. But my reasoning for being here is different...” Natalie replied as she got cut off by Amber.

“You went through my things, Natalie, I can’t believe you would do that. That is my life line right there whom I keep to myself. Get out of my office and don’t bother me.” Amber shouted slamming her notebook scaring Natalie.

“Amber, please...” Natalie pleaded.

“GET OUT NATALIE, NOW!” Amber shouted again.

Natalie left Amber’s study in tears feeling she literally made the worst mistake by admitting snooping into Amber’s things. Natalie then heard Amber screaming, shouting, begging for Sarah to come back knowing she wasn’t returning. Natalie didn’t mean to hurt Amber emotionally but it also hurt her seeing that she did this. Natalie grabbed her overnight bag that was left beside her bed with her boots, ditching her heels and everything else then made her way downstairs. Left a small note for Amber explaining that she knew not to hide who she is now and that she is on her way back home to New York to be with a man that she is scared of. Natalie hated her husband but what choice did she have, she wouldn’t make Amber love her when the time isn’t right for either of them and going back into her abusive marriage isn’t what her heart is wanting since serving him the papers. Natalie had no one, no siblings to depend on, her parents left the world, and she is alone fighting for an escape.

Natalie left the note on the kitchen table with tears flowing and left the house quietly as can be. Sheila would most definitely hated if she went back to her husband but Sheila has her own life besides keeping some stranger in her life. Natalie looked back at the house one more time knowing that Amber wouldn’t chase her, no matter how mad she is now, and how much it hurt her, she screwed up. Natalie almost made it to her car when she heard her name being called surprising that Amber is calling her out, stopping where I am at and not daring to turn around.

“Natalie, I don’t care what that note says or that you violated my privacy but don’t leave because I get mad.” Amber said in a calm manner.

“Amber, I am married to a man, and he’s abusive mentally and physically. Sarah, your future wife that died loved you and you loved her. I am not officially divorced and no matter how I feel for you it will not solve what I am still facing. I shouldn’t have stayed here for as long as I have but I like you, maybe even love you though I will never know until I am away from him. I am sorry, Amber for invading your privacy but we all have secrets and now you know mine.” Natalie replied still feeling tears down her cheeks.

“I like you too, maybe love you too but I won’t know if you leave me. I am sorry you’re husband is an asshole and should be dead in my consideration but I don’t care if you are married, divorced, engaged, single or any other term. Natalie, we met for a reason and I want you to stay.” Amber responded.

Natalie turned around looking at Amber though her blonde hair is a mess with tears streaming too. Natalie needed to wait this divorce out from her husband so she can be with Amber but she must try and go back to New York, live in an apartment and figure things out, she has enough money to make it on her own but she needs Amber to stay where she is, not get caught up in her mess. Natalie walked away without looking back but it hurt her doing this because if her husband found out she is having an affair with a woman it will make the case worse.