All Chapters of Poetry: Chapter 11 - Chapter 20

I open my eyes& hope with myOwn individual personality That the voices won’t try to be Pointless & louder than me So that when I close my eyesI won’t have to cry Because I can’t stand to be Alone another nightAt this point I just might Start to go crazyAs I become so lazySo as to not findFault with the voicesAs they scream at me in my mind About all of the choices That they have triedTo force upon meWhen I can finallyEnd myself & not try to be Kinder & betterThan the voices inside me  

What you don’t know about meIs that when I was a kidI always tried to put a lidOn all the scary voices around meSo to keep myself safeEverynight before I went to sleepI would put in my earbuds& hope that they would stop the floodOf the demons creeping up on meI didn’t want them to get inside my mind Because once they did they would put a bind On every part of my brain& I would start to feel a strainWhen I try to be myselfEven though I don’t want to be anybody else& I may have tried to stop themBut I can already feel the stem Growing from the seed they long ago Planted inside me, please understand the woe I feel as I watch my originalityStart to become something that's not apart of me Already I want to give upAgainst the way they’ve started to break-up What was left inside my head  

   “Antidote”All she thinks about is suicide Because she always has to try & act like she’s normal& be so formalWith the rest of the world Even as her brain furledAll of her emotions together Because it knew she wasn’t better Than all of the painThat she had tried to contain But she will always feelIt & it will always be more realWhen she is alone,She can’t help but groanAs she tips back her handFull of pills that are supposedly bannedHer stomach starts to hurtRight when her head hits the dirtShe closes her eyesMentally says her goodbyesThen slowly she smilesEven as the bilesClimbing up her throatBecause she knows she’ll never get the antidote 

She had finally found someoneShe thought she could be herself around & let a little bit more of her weirdness out Only for him to take her words& purposely burtThem out to everyone she asked him not to He only wanted a good laughBut little did he know every time he did that He broke off another small piece of her back Till she couldn’t take it anymoreShe closed herself off from him before He could see her run into a corner trying to hide from the words Coming from all sides and only towards herSociety judges her harder & harder The more he tries to marter The attention of the crowdsAs they start to close down What she was entirely& without a soundShe opens her mouth& screams outHis nameFinally he turns around& falls downTo his kneesOnly to open his eyes & seeThe mess he madeWhen he stuck out his neck to take Her wor

The stem of life is the one thing we all hold onto dearly.as though we will need it even if we die. We grab for it even in the darkest corners of life. so dark it feels more like death. and sometimes we let it go for fear of hurting those we care about. we are stubborn and greedy creatures. we hold ourselves above the rest except for when we try to lift others above ourselves because we think we care only to become jealous and want that glory for ourselves. that is where the green leaves of life come in to save us from our demons and turn us into people worth knowing.