Chapter 6

Emilie 

"Development of new organisms" I read aloud. 

"What chapter is that?" Anne asks peeping into my textbook, I let it slide off my lap to the floor. We're all seated on the floor of the living room. 

The AC blowing cold air really isn't necessary but Doofan insisted that we turned it on because as she claimed "our heads will get too hot once we start reading" I believe its just an excuse for her to doze off every once in a while.

"23" I say finally with a yawn, I wish I never agreed to this entire "holiday reading thing" in the first place, but with friends; a girl has to do what a girl has to do. 

"How did you get there so fast? You're at the end of the textbook already!" Anne gasps eyeing me suspiciously.

"Emilie is good at reading, its her thing" Doofan defends shrugging slightly, I know she detests being here, same as me, probably even more.

"Don't mind me, and don't listen to Doofan either, reading is everyone's thing" I brush off.

"But, but...how?" Anne pushes

"I have a lot of downtime on my hands, plus I haven't been out of the house since the holiday began" I explain truthfully.

"Y'know, Anne, honey... Its not a competition" Doofan chirps in while munching on the crumbs of the cake toast i made earlier on. Anne bristles at this and eyes my text book warily but she doesn't say anything.

"Besides, I don't remember half of what I read" I lie, hoping it helps ease her bruised ego.

"Forget it! Where are you?" She sniffs pointing to Doofan. 

She dusts her hands, wipes her mouth and swallows, all the while taking her God given time, i'm sure she's just doing all this to annoy Anne and I can see it working.

"I don't know, haven't started biology yet, I was trying to finish my physics" she says finally.

"We have a time table people, we're supposed to stick with it! That's how to measure progress. We agreed on spending 2 weeks studying biology, why did you deviate from the plan?!" Anne all but yells.

"I dunno, I felt like it" Doofan says simply

"Well, were you able to finish the the physics at least?" She inquires further barely controlling her anger.

"No" Doofan coughs up trying to look pitiful but she spoils it in the end by rolling her eyes.

I try (and fail) to stifle a laugh. Anne shoots me a dirty look, the second one as far as the last 3 hours are concerned and I am rueful.

"You're both not serious! I'm calling Tobi to see if she has had progress, since you both want to act like children" Anne announces, getting out her phone tapping its screen angrily.

"Chill out blessedly blessed Anne, we are reading, like you said, we still have time... don't short circuit" Doofan deadpans and I can't help myself anymore, I burst out laughing.

"Stop calling me that! Like you don't have any formerly embarrassing monickers yourself. And no, we don't have time!" she corrects sternly making air quotes around the words "have time"

"Its been while since you used that nickname, blessedly blessed Anne" I say in between fits of laughter. 

She shakes her head at me but it doesn't curb my laughter.

"First term has exactly 12 school weeks before it closes, and we all go for Christmas break. Second term has fourteen weeks before the Easter break. Between these two terms there will be a lot on our plates. The school board sent an email of the calendar to all interested parties, i was privileged to receive it." She explains

Doofan rolls her eyes at Anne's false modestly and I stifle the urge to point out that I received it too, no need to be petty I guess.

"This last session is filled to the brim with activities, especially for us final year students. JAMB comes up between February and March, and by the end of the second term, WAEC starts, followed closely by NECO." Anne Continues airily ignoring all our inputs. I give up easily, but Doofan lives for a challenge and continues stubbornly.

"We have 2 months worth of school hiatus, that is If you combine the breaks for both first and second term. Now, if you decide to use your breaks for study, even with first grade time management skills like mine, cramping in 10-12 hours a day..."

"10-12? Hours? How?" Doofan interjects genuinely shocked.

"...you could probably get by with C's but that's average and I am sure non of you want to settle for being average right? Right!"

"To get into any prestigious university here, you need to score at least 250 in jamb that's to be considered at least. And have a minimum of B's in your WASSEC, but even if your are considering going abroad, you'll take SAT's and TOEFL which you have to be thoroughly prepared for." She pauses for effect, no need really, I'm already sobered up as it is, my previous laughter forgotten.

"Now tell me, with all the gallivanting you are doing, how am I supposed to get anything done within this short space of time?" She finishes with flourish. 

She should probably win that valedictorian thing the school gives out, she's that good with words, I'd definitely trust her with my school leaving speech. The living room is dead silent as we digest her speech, she has a point, I hate to admit it but she does.

"Who doesn't have time?" We hear abruptly and it takes a while for us to realize Tobi probably picked the call unknown to us and is still on the line.

"Hello? Tobi?" Anne answers, trying to get up.

"Hey, come back here, we want to talk to her too. Put her on speaker" Doofan orders, pulling on Anne's leg to stop her from leaving, but i secretly believe she's just welcoming the distraction.

"I know!" Anne shoots back before continuing 

"Hello, Tobi how are you?"

"Yes, finally! I've been saying hello for sometime now, You really have airtime"

"Oh, sorry about that. And concerning the airtime thing... Don't worry your adorable self about it"

Both Doofan and I share a wary look at this juncture. Typical Anne, what is she up to this time?

"We were just calling to ask about the holiday timetable...the one i gave the group. Ah, yes have you had any progress?"

"Nope, I haven't touched that thing since you gave it to me" Tobi answers 

Anne lets out a groan and face palms herself.

"I have a good excuse" She defends and I can almost tell she's pouting.

"I have a project I am working on, a book... So yeah, it has taken up all my time, I really haven't been able to do much academic-wise. But guys, the book i'm talking about..." Tobi explains but Anne cuts her off before she can finish.

"Am I the only one bothered about the many exams that are going to determine our future?" Anne throws out, her voice going higher and higher.

"Yeah" Doofan says, I can tell she's enjoying herself at Anne's expense.

"Yes, pretty much" Tobi admits angrily before adding

"Also, cutting me off like that is rude, I wasn't finished."

"Please carry on tobi!" Doofan Shouts laughing. I pinch her arm, gesturing for her to keep quiet.

"Don't encourage her! You've read her books before, do you really think its something she has a future in? Be honest" at Anne's question, we all grow quiet... Again! Damn, she is good.

"I thought so" she finishes 

"Ouch" tobi says, I register the hurt in her voice.

"Don't mind them, T" I pipe up quickly, looking to patch this up before it blows

"Ah, Em, always the peace maker, but you said the same thing the last time we spoke" her voice is dripping with bile and I wince inwardly at what she says.

"No! C'mon tobi, don't be like that" I start but I do not have anything to add, she's right.

"No, seriously... thanks guys" she says and ends the call before anyone can say anything to stop her.

"Nice speech Blessed Anne, you need to apologise." Doofan chides shaking her head.

"No!"

"That's cruel"

"Tobi needed to hear it from her friends, her closest people. Only your true friends will tell you when your face is dirty. Call it tough love." Anne defends.

"Its tough alright, but it ain't love" Doofan counters

"Whatever"

"I am not going to drag with you, I don't have time for your childish ways."

"Okay" Doofan says shrugging and rolling her eyes.

"Emilie Sn-" she starts turning to me

"Nope, just Emilie will do." I interrupt as politely as I can manage, this entire thing has gone downhill faster than I could even register.

"Alright, Emilie, can you give us a summary of what you learnt? In the final chapter?"

I take a deep breath and begin explaining. As I round up I see Dan Dan walk into the kitchen and come back out with bread slices and bottle of Jam.

"Be careful" I call out as he sits himself on the table.

"I once read that at about twenty four weeks, the baby's 'stuff' drops because the body is too warm. It is a way of regulating the temperature of the organ" Doofan says raising her eyebrows suggestively.

"What stuff?" I ask, I wasn't really paying attention. Dan Dan has a bread knife, I can never trust my siblings with cutlery.

"Its testicles" she answers 

"That's a lie!" Anne counters, but her voice doesn't sound disbelieving.

"Its true, Google it!" She defends 

"Testicles!" My brother yells jamming the bread in this mouth. How did he hear us from all the way over there?.

"God! No, no testicles Dan Dan, stop saying that!" I warn, walking to him pinning his arms by his sides while Doofan roars with laughter.

"What?! Why are you laughing? You did this, better fix it!" I scold exasperated

"Is this not funny to you?" She demands.

"You are so immature, you take everything for granted" Anne says all seriousness returning.

"Its a joke, chill"

"I'm leaving, maybe this holiday reading thing isn't working out..."

"That's what we've been trying to tell you" Doofan shouts angrily. Lying on her back and placing a lazy arm over her eyes.

"...as a group. I'll carry on by myself" Anne finishes despite Doofan's words

"Wait, don't go... We didn't mean it like that" I try, Dan Dan struggles out of my grasp forcing me to stay, instead of following her out.

"Forget it Emilie Snow. Bye guys" I cringe at her using my full name but wave all the same as she closes the door behind her.

"You should apologise." I say throwing Doofan's words back at her 

"Maybe..." She starts, standing up and stacking the plates we-she used, against one arm before walking towards the kitchen.

"Or maybe not" she calls once she's inside. I shake my head at her and begin arranging our books littered on the floor, this reading session is definitely over.

"Testicles!" Dan Dan yells triumphantly standing on the arm of the couch.

I run my hands through my tattered cornrows and sigh, getting that out of his mouth will be the challenge of the century.

"Testicles!" He repeats smiling at me.