Chapter 6: MJ

Alexis

THE RINGING ON my phone startles my sleepy thoughts.

It’s 2 am and being called on the phone at this very late hour is a first time to me. Grabbing it, I hastily check the screen and see that it’s an unregistered number. Confused, I carefully press accept and place the gadget near my ears.

“Hello?” I quietly say, too afraid to wake anyone in the house.

“Hey.”

I almost drop my phone when I hear the familiar voice on the line. “H-hey, MJ? Is this you?”

She giggles, “Yeah, sorry if called at this hour.”

I listen as I feel myself getting drowned with excitement. Why is she calling me? I smile to myself as I close my laptop and excitedly sits on my bed. I just can’t believe that I’m actually talking to her on the phone. And the fact that she’s called me first makes me feel giddier.

“I happened to see your active status on Facebook,” she says, “can’t sleep?”

“Actually,” I say as I try to control my voice that’s becoming unsteady by now, “I’m writing my lessons on Monday.”

“Oh,” she replies. I hear a slight disappointment in her tone so I add, “but—I’m already done with it. I was just getting ready to sleep when you called.”

MJ heaves as sigh, as if telling me that she’s relieved. “So, you’re a night owl.”

“And so are you,” I reply, “you should be sleeping already, you know.”

“I just got home.”

“From where?” I ask, crossing my legs.

“Bella’s.”

Oh. Okay. I try to choke down the negative feeling that’s engulfing me all of a sudden when I hear Bella’s name. There is totally no reason for me to over react. “What were you doing at her place?” I ask, trying to sound excited.

“We played ML,” she says, “damn, that girl is gamer.”

I roll my eyes. “You cannot tell if a person is a gamer just because she knows how to play Mobile Legends. Being a gamer means so much more—you have to use the word properly.”

“So, your point is?” she says, laughing.

“Does she know how to play hard core online games? If not, then stop showering her with such adjectives.”

My face splits into a grin when I hear her laugh like crazy.

“You understand, Ma’am Alexis, that you don’t really know what you’re talking about, right?”

“You bet!” I reply, giggling, “I don’t really know where the heck I got those words of wisdom.”

“That was funny though,” she says. Geez. Hearing her laugh melts my heart.

A brief silence suddenly engulfs us. I decide to savor her slow breathing on the phone as I wait for her for her to say something.

“Babe? Can I ask you a favor?”

“Sure,” I reply as I unmindfully tap my index finger at the back of my phone case.

“Go out with me,” she says.

I chuckle. “Girl, you ask my boyfriend.”

“I mean it, Alexis,” she says in a more serious tone, “let’s have fun, tonight.”

I gasp, “Are you kidding me? It’s 2 am, for God’s sake.”

“I know. But I’ll be there in five minutes.”

~~~

I don’t know why I agreed to this but I manage to sneak out of the house quietly when MJ texted me that she is already waiting outside. I can’t believe I’m doing this. I never experienced sneaking or going out without telling my parents beforehand. They will literally lose their senses when they heard of this.

“Then let it be a secret,” she replies when I told her about my dilemma. She guides me towards her motorcycle which she parked few houses away.

I just shrug.

“Nice jacket,” I say as I look at her Denim. My black hoody just doesn’t match with hers.

“So, where are we going, B.I.?” I ask as I climb her vehicle.

“What’s B.I.?”

“Bad influence,” I whisper.

“Geez.”

MJ maneuvers her motorcycle with ease. I snake my arms around her waist as I feel the breeze embraces our bodies.

“You smell so good,” I say as I sniff her back, “you’re wearing a Victoria’s Secret perfume.”

“No, I don’t wear perfume,” she replies, “it’s just lotion.”

“It smells like Victoria’s Secret,” I say, insisting.

“Smart ass,” she exclaims, laughing.

I look around and smile as I feel the cold breeze enter my nose. I couldn’t remember the last time I did this, just riding around town, with a driver who really smells good, uh. I can’t stop myself from leaning my head at her back and sniffing her scent repeatedly.

“Just be comfortable, babe. We’ll be there in about ten minutes,” she says.

~~~

We stop at a 24-hour diner. God, I’ve been dreaming to visit this place but Gab doesn’t have the time to bring me here.

“Would you mind if I order two bottles of beer?” she whispers.

“Go ahead. I don’t mind.”

I immediately fish my wallet on my pocket jeans but she stops my hand from doing so.

“It’s my treat,” she says dismissively.

I smile at her and decide to look for a seat.

There are five people inside the diner, a couple and three teenagers who are quietly eating their ordered meal. They take a glance at me and I return it with a smile. They smile back and shyly talk in whispers. I decide to choose a seat near a window that’s facing the ocean.

“Hey, are you okay?” she asks as soon as she gets back to me. The waitress follows, bringing a tray. I look at her and mutter a shy thank you when I realize that MJ has ordered two bottles of cold beer, large French fries and my ever favorite siomai.

“It’s nice in here, isn’t it?” she says.

I nod my head in reply. “I’ve always wanted to visit this place. But—”

Sigh. How I wish Gab has more time with me these days.

“I always go to this place, to chill,” she says when she realizes that I’m not speaking anymore.

I smirk at her. “At two in the morning?”

She chuckles. “Well, not really.”

I watch her as she raises the bottle to her lips.

“MJ,” I say. “I need to ask you something personal.” She nods her head, urging me to go on. I tell her about Kelly, leaving her name on the story.

“She’s just admitted that she’s gay. I don’t see any wrong with that,” she remarks as soon as I stop talking.

I look at her and sigh, “She has hidden it from me for such a long time.”

“Babe, it ain’t easy, you know.”

“Did you experience that too? How—” I suddenly realize that I don’t want her to be offended, so I choke back the question that has been ringing on my head, “N-never mind.”

MJ gently holds my hand and says, “It’s okay. You can ask me anything.”

Well…

“How did you know that you are—not like the other girls?”

“You mean, how did I find out that I ‘m not straight?”

I nod.

“Babe, I always knew that I’m different. When I was a kid, my mother doesn’t really know how to keep me inside the house. I was pretty outgoing—and wild.”

Huh, pretty much like me.

“—but me, coming out, is a choice. I mean, I can always choose to leave my internal issues and live my life according to the standards of our society.”

“But you didn’t,” I say.

“Yes,” she says as she nods her head, “I chose to be who I am. This is me.”

I take another sip of my beer, then stare at her. Her gaze is now fixed outside the window. “Do you ever regret anything?” I ask, twiddling the bottle around my fingers.

“No,” she says without looking at me, “I didn’t regret anything.”

I get all the luxury of staring at her beautiful face because her eyes are still fixed on the dark horizon before us. I remember those times when MJ and I are still in high school. I remember every heart pounding moment and awkward smiles, and how I secretly stared at her from afar, hoping that someday, I’ll feel her closer to me. And now, here we are, sneaking around at dawn, unfolding things that only she and I understand. Truth be told, it’s more than everything I’ve wished for in the past. I now believe that dreams do come true.

“Let’s get out of here” she suddenly says, holding my hand to pull me up. My silent thoughts are suddenly disturbed.

“Where are we going?” I ask as I hastily shove the last piece of siomai meat on my mouth. She just winks at me and replies, “I wanna show you something cool.”

~~~

“Wow!”

I couldn’t believe my eyes. A ten-minute ride is all it takes to witness this majestic view.

MJ brought me in an elevated area where both of us could see the panoramic view of our town, as well as its nearby places. We are currently facing the wide horizon before us, still dark and cold since it’s just past three in the morning. But I can’t think of the icy feeling anymore. All I can think about is the glittery sky in front of us, and MJ’s warm body beside me.

“I often see a lot of stars in the sky, but seeing them this time feels a little more intimate,” I say, sighing, “they feel a little closer.”

“I know right,” she replies, “I’ve discovered this place two years ago. It was when everything about me has totally fell apart.”

My smiles fade when I suddenly feel a hint of sadness in her voice. “What’s wrong?” I ask.

MJ stares back at me. Her lonely eyes draw me closer to her gaze. I feel wonderstruck with the million stars above, but I’ve suddenly forgotten my excitement when I see her looking so down. She looks sad amidst the beautiful scenery that has been gracing our eyes. A live example of irony.

“When my grandmother died—”

Silence.

“—it broke my heart. I just couldn’t accept the fact that she’s gone—and my family and I experienced so much bitterness after that. Back then, everything just felt so—empty. I thought there was no end for the pain. I didn’t like living anymore.”

“I must say that your grandmother’s death has truly put a deep cut in your heart,” I say softly.

“Yeah. She was the only one who accepted me without questions,” she replies, discreetly wiping a stubborn tear that’s beginning to fall from her eyes. I gently rub her shoulder and I shudder when I suddenly feel her arms around my waist. Her body is slightly facing me, but her gaze is still on the flickering stars before us.

More silence.

“I don’t want to see you like this—” I whisper. “It breaks my heart, too.”

She finally stares at me as her hand tucks a few strands of my hair behind my ear. Her icy fingers barely touch my earlobe. “Today is her third death anniversary. I miss her.”

I reach for her nape and hug her, tiptoeing just so I could reach her and make her feel a lot better.

“We all get to miss all those people who mattered to us,” I whisper as I close my eyes behind her, sniffling her smell, “it takes time to remove the pain, babe. But remember that you can’t really live in the past. But she’s still here,” I say, pointing to her heart, “forever immortalized in your memories.”

She heaves a sigh and tightens her grasp to me.

“Thank you,” she says, her voice softly tickling my ear.

xoxoPAxoxo