His eyes

What was she proud of? That it was people from wealthy families who convinced them to go out with us? It was pathetic how superficial some people were. I suddenly felt disgust. Yes, as I knew Kate, she was proud of this, I thought sarcastically. Sometimes I was happy that we were so incredibly different on some points. Then at least I didn't have to think about something like that any further.

"I just hope they're not philistines," I said quietly, not knowing if she heard it.

She just parked her freshly washed convertible and I saw where we would spend the evening. I rolled my eyes and ran my thumb and forefinger over my nose. Of course it had to be “La Habanna”, what else? The most expensive cocktail bar in Jacksonville, right on the St. Johns River Promenade.

Was it only superficiality surrounding me, I thought annoyed? I already didn't feel like getting to know the people who were waiting for us. Hoping to see a white Audi, I turned to all sides. Please Daniel, don't leave me alone, with all the philistines - I joined Kate and implored him in my mind, hoping that he would hear. I knew almost certainly that he heard my thoughts. But something like an instruction manual would still not have hurt.

"Please, Lila, don't be a spoilsport," she said with a pout and got out of the car.

"I'll try," I said, hoping that Daniel would be there soon and got out too.

It was only a few meters to the bar when I saw the Audi pull into the parking lot. Immediately, anticipation rose in me and I felt thousands of butterflies in my stomach. For the first time I became aware that I was in love. In love with Daniel. And for the first time I thought about what he was revealing to me today at school. His love, his forbidden love, as he called it. He “couldn't” feel that way, he said and I didn't know why. What was behind that word? Did he have a secret and I just haven't figured it out yet? Question after question, I had so many to ask him. I just had to find the right moment. We had to slowly get closer, as it would have been on the first day.

"I'll go in and say hello to the others, okay, Lila?" Kate asked with a smile.

It was impossible to ignore what she was alluding to.

"Yes, we'll be right there." Did I just say we? Again the butterflies reported in my stomach.

I stood on the sidewalk, completely embarrassed and alone, waiting for him. It was so natural that I was scared of doing something undesirable. Basically Daniel was a stranger to me, I couldn't deny that. And yet I waited for him like an ally. Maybe he was too. Ally with me, against the rest of the waiting for us. A bunch of philistines.

"Hello Lila," he said with a stunning smile when he was only a few steps away from me. How could a person be so irresistibly beautiful? It almost hurt physically. I couldn't breathe. He looked just gorgeous in his white cotton pants and nicely fitted white shirt.

His eyes glowed an azure blue, which made the overall picture look even more harmonious. According to my theory, it would mean that he was happy about something.

He looked around in surprise, as if hoping to spot someone. I looked at him questioningly. What was he doing there? After seeing no one, he turned back to me. His face looked confused and surprised. After I had understood what he was getting at, I wanted to sink into the ground. The blush spread across my face and I looked away, embarrassed. Suddenly he laughed, almost overjoyed, like a child. He was happy, it was like an honor for him that I showed him with my waiting.

"Are you waiting for me?" - he asked again in disbelief and nudged his chest with his index finger. He obviously couldn't believe it.

"Yes." - there was no air.

Breathe, purple.

"But if you don't want that, which of course I can understand, then I'll go."

"No! ... Please stay. I am just surprised. I mean, you've tried to ignore me since I arrived and now you're standing here waiting for me of all people. Please don't hold it against me that I have to get used to this wonderful development first. ”

I couldn't blame him for irritating him. My behavior almost bordered on idiocy. I was surprised that he was still talking to me at all.

"I'm really sorry that you didn't deserve that, you can't help it that I was ... well, that I was so confused" - I didn't go on, it hurt to think about the agony. About how he must have felt the last few weeks.

Suddenly he was very close to me, which I hadn't even noticed. Did he move or was it me?

He was only a step away from me and I could smell his smell and his warmth.

Especially the warmth, it was actually the wrong word for what I felt. It was more like a warm energy, like an invisible aura, it made me feel peaceful, like a compulsion that I now felt around him. Why have I never noticed this before? Had I suppressed my senses so badly that I didn't notice? I was surprised at myself. Daniel had been sitting next to me at school for quite a while, after all, and I was so senseless.

Again I was surrounded by a floral scent that stole all my senses.

I looked at the floor, embarrassed, and dared not look up.

This moment in which he was so close to me had something that shouldn't be, something forbidden that I should run away from. Something inside of me screamed that I have to do it. I was confused. Now my senses were apparently sharper than necessary. I took a small step back, hoping that this strange feeling would go away, but it stayed. Something wanted to warn me about it, but I wasn't ready to heed it.

Was that one of the moments I was so scared of? That I discovered something I wouldn't like? Something that could keep me from loving him? Was it the reason why I was so reluctant to admit the love I felt for him and to allow him to come closer to me?

I didn't know the answer to all of the many questions Daniel raised in me.

I felt his hand under my chin. He touched it so gently, like something that would break instantly if he wasn't careful.

He was careful, just for whatever reason. Did he know beforehand that I would be scared off if he got too close?

A tiny premonition streamed through me and a cold shiver came over me. Could it be that this is exactly why he has suffered so much over the past few weeks? He hadn't even tried to get close to me, which wasn't normal behavior. Any other person would have at least sought a conversation or something. He on the other hand just suffered, as if he knew that maybe it was better - it was better for me - although he too had fallen in love with me and of that I was pretty sure by now. He unconsciously gave me this assurance that I was right.

His fingers pushed my chin back up, forcing me to look into his face. Lila, it's just a totally impossible theory, I told myself. It calmed me down a bit because my mind told me it couldn't be.

I looked at him, hoping he wouldn't notice.

I had never been so close to him as at this moment. I could see every detail on his face. I could count every lash, his even skin looked like silk. It shimmered like that, too, I've never noticed it before. Again something I had ignored before.

The highlighted cheekbones made his face even more perfect. Everything in that face was in excessive balance and harmony. That was probably the secret of his superhuman good looks.

I was scared to look him in the eye. Afraid of never emerging from this blue again without any hope of salvation, of drowning. For a brief moment, out of curiosity, I managed what I would find in it. He was able to read my mind.

And if that was the case, then it has certainly not escaped my notice that I just discovered something supernatural about him. Something that human mind couldn't explain.

And I was not disappointed. Immediately I was inundated with a huge wave of love, fear and pain. It fitted too well. Was i right? What was wrong with him? What scared him so much?

His fingers came off my chin and I had to come back to reality.

"I suggest that we dare to start again here and now, what do you think of that?" - he said in his soft and gentle angelic voice and held out a white rose to me.

My eyes widened. He surprised me. Where did he get it from?

And in response he said: “I brought this for you. I think the two of you are very similar, at least in your fragility and your beauty, ”he shyly admitted and held it out to me again.

As if it wasn't enough that he was there, the greatest gift he could give me after all that I had done, he still had to compliment me. I really didn't deserve that, I thought, ashamed.

“Thank you, she is beautiful. One of my favorite flowers, ”I admitted, embarrassed.

"I know," he said, barely audible.

It seemed like he knew so much about me. As if he'd always known me. I also added that to my invisible notepad. He knew too much about me. Too much for a stranger. And I felt too much trust and a supernatural security in him, for a stranger.

"Do we want to go in? The others are certainly wondering where we are. ”- He was probably not wrong with that.

And I was happy to have to think of something else.

Although I still wasn't exactly looking forward to meeting these people. Philistine. I would have preferred to spend more time with Daniel. Alone.

We could have walked the promenade like many couples in love did. He would hold my hand in his and, to top it off, kiss me gently and trigger these wonderful feelings in me. Nice imagination.

I only noticed my surroundings again when Daniel opened the entrance door to the cocktail bar for me. Soft Caribbean sounds played around the large room and invisibly flooded it with an exotic warmth. It wasn't busy, but considering the prices, it was nothing out of the ordinary. I tried to ignore this point. Most of the voices came from the right corner, which was a little hidden behind palm leaves, and it was not difficult to guess that there was our company, which was almost unknown to both Daniel and me. Except Kate, of course, who could hardly be overheard.

I didn't particularly like those moments when I had to introduce myself to someone. Most of the time I was overcome by the fear that people might not like me or that I would not meet their requirements.

Today was particularly bad. It was almost to be expected that this rich crowd of philistines would reject me. I wasn't in their league, as Kate would have put it.

But as if with an invisible hand, Daniel took all my fears and doubts away from me by his very presence. I just felt safe. I had to smile to myself for a moment. My ally, I remembered.

Without asking beforehand, we walked towards the large table that filled the corner.

When they saw us, for a split second there was complete silence and immobility.

I briefly made a mental note of this behavior, which Daniel triggered in others through his presence. And I was sure it wasn't me. So I wasn't making it up. This superhuman charisma that he possessed not only electrified me.

I looked around briefly. Three guys looked at me with interest and stirred their cocktail glasses. They didn't interest me. At least not in the way I seem to be. It would be enough for me if they were just nice and that is what they seemed at first glance. They seemed familiar and it was obvious that they did something together more often. Next to Kate was the only girl I didn't know. She had brunette hair that was pinned up. A nifty fringe in waves adorned her forehead. Her make-up was applied almost perfectly. The eyeliner that encircled her blue eyes, as well as the lip contours of her rosé shimmering mouth, were exactly drawn.

Somehow a feeling of envy and jealousy overcame me, I now had an urgent need to protect Daniel from her.

She was so perfect and, in my eyes, suited him a lot better than I ever could.

And as if trying to provoke me, she half jumped up to greet Daniel. I didn't even look at me. Anger rose in me or was it jealousy?

I couldn't tell. Maybe it was because I've never been in love.

She held out her hand to him, as one would have done in a much earlier decade and said in a seductive voice: "Hello, my name is Alexandra Dawson." Her look told me once again unmistakably that it was only Daniel. It reminded me of a big cat that had just found its prey and didn't want to share it.

Daniel took her hand and indicated an air kiss. He smiled briefly at her. Something familiar seemed to bind them together for a moment. As I had met Daniel, he must have just wanted to be polite.

"Hello, I'm Daniel Callahan and this is my company, the wonderful Delilah Smith," he said with a naturalness that made me blush.

He smiled amused when he saw that Alexandra was also blushing, but not out of embarrassment, but rather out of envy and jealousy. It looked like that was exactly what he was up to. I had to laugh to myself too. Alexandra quickly sat down again without saying another word.

The three boys, too, apparently pleased to see her so upset, although she quickly recovered.

"Hello, I'm Ben Dawson, Alexandra's brother and this is Mike and James, my best friends," he said friendly and all three nodded in greeting.

Ben stood out quite a bit with his looks. He was so much prettier than Mike and James. But still he couldn't get close to Daniel.

The only thing that connected him to Alexandra were his eyes.