006

Stepping into this house was like an empty void filled with unwanted memories and hate. Every passing day that i had to sleep here and pretend like everything was alright was like a blow to my stomach.

"Aren't you heading back? "i asked the half English brunette trailing behind me while dangling his car keys.

"I know you won't survive another second without me love, you don't have to worry about it. Besides i don't want you blowing up my phone every five seconds and begging me to come keep you company "

I just shake my head and roll my eyes. He does this sometimes. Saying stuff that a corny boyfriend would say to cheer his girl up, or pretend I'm a whinny girlfriend who can't go a second without him.

I swear i have the weirdest bestie ever. And i still don't know how it happened.

Oh.... My mom and he's were best friends.

At the thought of that my heart clenches. No, no no this is not the time to be thinking about this.

"You do realize i have to wash off and go to work right? You had your fun hour with me, but until tomorrow i don't think we have time to do anymore catching up "

We stopped in front of my room while i pull the door open and walk in with Kyle a few steps behind me.

Turning back to grab his expression, i notice he's frowning and glaring at the door handle before pushing it to shut behind us.

"No you don't. "

"Sorry? "

"I talked to your boss, you have the day free today. "

"What? " I'm quite shocked "i never have a day off ."

"I had a nice chat with him. "

"Wait! You talked to victor!? "

"If you mean the thirty six looking guy with the creepy jungle hair and tangled beard, then yes. "

"Why would you do that? "

"Because you need to rest Lexa, you're stressing too much. "

"No I'm not, I'm perfectly fine ."

"That's what you always say "he stares at me with so much concentration and sucks in a dip breath. "you know what? Go shower and come back lets talk about this " he practically pushes me into the bathroom "you smell like sweat ."

I don't argue with him. I just do what he says, and by the time the steaming hot water washes down my body, i feel all my tense muscles Release.

I couldn't help but drown into my own thoughts based on everything that's happened this past week.

I wonder what Jim is doing right now. Was he with that blondie right now? No, he'll probably be at work. But what if she was with him? What is so special about her that made him choose her over me?

I mean sure she's pretty, and hot but I'm pretty and hot too right?

I'm not exactly sure what you define as hot but I'm pretty sure i have nice enough curves and a generous ass. My breasts aren't huge or anything but their the perfect size.

Or is it because I'm dark?

No not black! I'm only half African American and my skin is only a bit tanned than the average white girl you see but so what? That can't be the reason right? We were together for six months and i never noticed any racist traits in him. If he was racist then he won't have dated me at all to begin with right?

Or is it because she's rich and not ashamed to spend her parents money how ever she wants unlike me?

This is so annoying!

I drop my head to rest on the white bathroom tiles as the water pours down my back.

The tears I've been trying to hold start pouring down my eyes.

I miss him! I miss him so much. I miss his caresses, i miss his hugs, i miss the way he nibbles on his lips and drags the other side with his pinky, i miss his laugh, i miss his smile, i miss the way throws his head back and laughs whenever he thinks I've said something funny, i miss the way he made me feel when i was in a bad place.

The tears continue to drip down my face and now i can't differentiate it from the water.

I don't know what hurts more, seeing him every day and pretend nothing ever happened between us or knowing that i wasn't good enough for him.

Sniffing, i slid down to the ground and rap my arms around my legs with the water still dripping down on me.

"Lexa? Are you okay in there ?" i hear Kyle nock on the bathroom door and i mutter a not purposely week "yeah "and i don't like the way i sound.

"Lex, are you still in there? What's taking so much time? "

I clear my throat and shout back "in a minute "

I stepped out of the shower and wrapped myself up. Towel drying my hair and body, i slip into the pink panther pajamas i brought in with me before walking out.

I meet Kyle sitting on my bed. Hearing the bathroom door shut behind me, he looked up and took up my appearance in a short pink panther pajama shorts and a big same cartoon design shirt, it's not new to either of us, we've both seen each other half naked a lot number of times before, but i notice a slight indescribable emotion flicker in his eyes before they Vanish completely and he lifts them up to my face.

"What took you so long? "

I sighed heavily and went to sit beside him on my bed. "i lied "

He looks at me weirdly "huh? "

"In the car when you asked me what was bothering me, i lied, the test... That's not all "

His expression turned serious in an instant and he turns fully to face me "what is it? "

I suck in a breath before speaking. "Jim and i broke up "

He frowned "Jim? Who's Jim? "

I stared at him incredulously. Seriously.

"Jim Lewis! The guy that I've been dating for the past Six months "

"Oh... You mean the blonde bartender"

"Yeah. "i fold my legs together and let the air con blow through my tangled curles. "the blonde bartender "

He raps him arm around my shoulder pulling me closer to him, "are you okay? "

"Honestly, no "i admit with a sniff "at first i thought it was just a misunderstanding, but turns out i wasn't good enough for him "

"What do you mean you weren't good enough for him? "he's boring holes into my head with his gaze since mine refuses to meet his.

"He's with someone else "i smile a sad smile.

"The son of a Bitch! "Kyle curses, looking really angry.

I shouldn't cry, i know i shouldn't, but the tears just keep falling on their own and i don't want Kyle to see it, but he does.

He pulls my chin up with his index finger so i am looking at him "well too bad for him "he smiles "because you my love are on for the best date of your life "

"Date? "

"Yes "

I frown "with who? "

"Me of course "he rolls his eyes "if anyone wasn't good enough for anyone it was him "he brushes away a strand of hair that had fallen down my face "i mean.. "he scoffed "the guy had a tree trump as a nose...."he shivers in disgust.

That made me laugh. It's true though, Jim is blessed with the right looks, gorgeous hair and perfect body, but his nose was big enough to drive a multitude of rats away.

"And he doesn't like chocolate? Who doesn't like chocolate? "Kyle complains.

"I don't "i raised my hand still chuckling.

"That's because you're weird as fuck "he waves me off like its nothing.

Nodding my head, i smiled and muttered a "true. "

I snoot closer and wrap my self around him with my head resting on his hard chest that never seize to bring me comfort. He wraps his own arms around me and rests his chin on my damp hair as i took in his faint smell of masculine perfume .

"Thank you ". I pull away and look him in the eye with a warm smile.

No matter how annoying and playfully childish Kyle is, he always finds a way to get my mind off things and make me feel better.

To hell with Jim Lewis. If he doesn't want me then that's his problem not mine, I'm an independent woman and i can live without him.

"Enough about me, how about you? "i coo "how was LA? "

"Hot! "he answers immediately "it was so hot! "

I chuckle a little "it's LA, what were you expecting? "i roll my eyes.

"there was this one time i went to the beach, and i swear those California girls are something else... "

"Yeah? "i couldn't wipe the smile off my face. "tell me about it. "

And then he's going to say something like ' i met this hot girl in a pastel bikini, and damn! She was hot! We shared a few drinks, flirt a little, and just when i thought she was going to kiss me---'

"She threw up on me! "Kyle yells, is expression one of someone who just swallowed a whole plate of rotten pickles. I couldn't help the laughter that burst right through me.

I just knew he would say that! Figures! because who brings beer to a beech? Wait! People don't do that right?

Whatever, how would it know.

"And you know what she said next? "he whined. Imitating a forced female voice he mumbled "well it's been nice talking to you kid, but I've got to meet my boyfriend. Clean that up yeah? "

I can't help it, i fall back on the bed and laugh so hard until my tummy hurt.