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2020-10-25 23:24:30** Sophia's point of view **
I woke up in the morning wrapped in his arms. I felt happy and relieved as I remembered last night. He was so lovely when he found out, I wasn't expecting that response, hence why I cried last night.
I moved slightly so I could look at him. He was fast asleep and looked even more handsome while asleep. He started to stir. 'Shit' I said in my head. I was enjoying looking at him, I didn't want him to wake up.
"Morning" His voice was so husky.
"Morning" I smilled back.
I felt the urge to kiss him so I did. He was taken back at first, but then he kissed me back. Something deep inside me started to stir. Then next thing I know I put my hand under the bed sheet and touched his manhood. He was startled and broke the kiss.
"You don't have to do that" he has a look of concern on his face.
"I know. I want to" I don't know if I can go all the way but I feel like I can do this.
"I'm not going to say no. But only if you are sure"
"I'm sure" I smiled back at him.
"Okay we will take it slow" his face and voice is now full of lust.
My heart was beating really fast. I haven't done anything like this, but it feels right. Most importantly I'm doing it on my own terms. We started to kiss again.
I carried on rubbing my hand up and down his shaft, one of his hands went to my private part and started to stroke it through my pants. I was feeling all sorts of things that I haven't felt before, I can't explain it, but it felt magical. I looked into his eyes, they were full of desire.
The next thing I know he pulled his hand away and went down the bed, he bent down and pulled my pants down my legs. I started to squirm. "Is this okay" he asked with concern. All I could do was nod.
I can't believe we just made love to each other. It was everything I hoped my first consensual time would be. I couldn't help but to look at him and smile. He had a weird look on his face, I'm not sure why.
"Is everything okay?" I asked
"Yes" was the only thing he repiled.
I wasn't sure what was going on but I didn't like it. I felt uneasy for some reason. The happiness I was feeling was now slowing fading away.
He stood up and went to his bathroom. I took this time to get dressed. I was feeling unsure and vulnerable, so getting dressed would make me feel less like this.
"I think you should go now." He said through the bathroom door.
I didn't reply. I just grabbed my stuff and ran out the house crying. I knew I couldn't have the feeling of happiness in my life. For some reason life didn't want me to live a happy life, it always threw hard times at me.
Once I got back to my place, I locked my door and ran to my bedroom and cried till I fell asleep.
I woke up the next morning still in my clothes, I had a sudden feeling of being used and feeling dirty. I haven't had this feeling since Ryan, unless it was a nightmare. I can't believe how stupid I was to trust him. How could he kick me out after everything we did. Are all men the same?
I spent the next two weeks going to work and back home. I didn't hear from him the first few days, I sent him messages which he read but didn't reply to, after that I decided to turn my phone off. I haven't turned it back on since then, not even once. I just want to be on my own. But that didn't stop Sally from stopping by.
One day at work, I was sorting out the rails, putting the clothes in size order when a customer came up behind me and made me jump. It wasn't any customer it was Lewis. Why was he here?
"Can I help you?" I put on my best customer voice.
"Yes, are you free after work?" He asked.
"Sorry I'm not. If you don't need any help with purchasing anything then I need to get going." I said with a blank face.
"Sure. We still need to talk. If you don't want to talk, I understand but like I said it is important." He smiled. But I could tell he was getting impatient with me.
I went home that night and thought how can my life go from being happy and living life again to going to shit. I am just going to do what I normally do and put everything at the back of my mind and carry on, it's all I can do, otherwise everything would get too much.
Another week went by and I started to feel ill. I guess I wasn't taking good care of myself. I still haven't spoken to anyone apart from Sally, I was starting to get back to my old life where I was content.
I rushed to the bathroom to throw up. I haven't been sick for years. I need to make a doctor's appointment so I can get what ever I need to feel better. I made an appointment for later that afternoon.
I walked into the doctor's and to my surprise I was seen straight away, that never happens they are always running late.
"Miss Longthorpe, please take a seat" the doctor asked still looking at his computer.
"So what can I do for you today?" He asked once he looked at me.
"I haven't been feeling well. I just need to know what's wrong so I can get better." I replied.
"Okay. What seems to be the problem.?"
Latest chapter
Sophia's journey - how to open up and love 23
** Meanwhile in the Styles livingroom **"Hugo. Please take a seat." My dad said to me, so I did.I only came round as mum and dad said it was important."You know me and your mum have wanted you to get married and settled down for some time. Well..." he paused and mum took his hand in hers."When Harriet, Charles's wife, was pregnant with the twins, we decided if one was a girl you and her would get married once you was of age." He sighed and mum took over."Unfortunately after the birth Harriet and the baby girl had disappeared from the hospital. Charles and Lewis were taken to a different hospital a few hours after they were born, as he had a few issues that need specialist care. When Charles went back to the hospital to pick up Harriet and his baby girl, they had vanished. The hospital said they had no record of her or the births." Mum now had tears running down her cheeks. I didn't know what to say. What can I say
Sophia's journey - how to open up and love 22
"I don't know if I could ever forgive him for hurting my Sophia." Dad said and got up to go to bed."Night son.""Night dad."The next day Sophia came up to me and said that Sally her best friend was coming over. I can't wait to meet the woman who has always been there for Sophia. If it wasn't for her Sophia wouldn't be here now, Sophia said so herself."Sally is coming over, she should be here in 15 minutes." Sophia was happy, like really happy. I could tell Sally ment to world to her at this moment."I can't wait to meet her." I smiled.Sally nocked on the door."I'll get it" Sophia said as she rushed to answer the door.They said hi to each other as the hugged. When they pulled apart Sophia brought Sally over to me."Sally this is my brother Lewis." She smilled "Lewis this is my best friend Sally."I said hi and smiled at Sally. She was breathtaking, with her b
Sophia's journey - how to open up and love 21
'What arranged marriage? It can't be for me. As far as my parents know I am still seeing Sophia, surly they won't do this while they think I'm dating someone else?' I questioned myself in my head.They finished that conversation and moved on to talk about other stuff. At this point I decided to go to the bar and get drunk. I've had enough of this gala already and I just won't to go home.After about five shots and three wines I decided to call it a day, well actually Lewis decided that for me."Hugo man. We need to get you to your car, you need to go home. I think you've had enought to drink.""No man. I'm good. I'm goooood." I slurred and chuckled at the same time. I was starring to see two of him as he put his arm around me and lifted me off the stool.Lewis helped me walk over to my car and put me in the passenger seat. I guess he is going to drive me home.We we're driving in a awkward sil
Sophia's journey - how to open up and love 20
"Yo...your daughter?" Said both Debbie and Henry at the same time.The look on their face was of pure shock. They know everything that had happen with my wife and daughter, they were the ones who helped me through it all. Debbie was best friends with Harriet when it all happened, so she also took it hard."Yes, we have finally found her." I exclaimed with a huge smile on my face.I could see the confusion on their faces, even Hugo looked confused."I didn't know you had a daughter, it's a shame she can't be here." Hugo said with a smile, not realising he has already met her."Yes it is a shame." I sighed.I really wanted to have a go at him for what he has done to Sophia. Even though she hasn't told us who the father of the baby was, both me and Lewis believe that it was Hugo, given the timeline and everything thing.All I could do was smile at him and swallow my words, I would be making a scene if I voice my tho
Sophia's journey - how to open up and love 19
I have spent the last three days at home being looked after by both Lewis and dad. It has been nice to have them with me, it's not how I thought I would be spending the first few days living with them.Today I have decided to go and see Hugo to let him know I lost our baby. I don't expect anything from him but I need to get it off my chest and tell him so I can move on from this. Don't get me wrong I will never forget my baby, it will always hold a piece of my heart.Once I got to Hugo's office I started to get nervous. It was the same as last time, I am once again sitting in the waiting area.I was looking around and noticed that a woman had gone into Hugo's office with a bag of food and then left almost as soon as she entered. I took that as a opportunity that he was alone having his lunch.I got up from my seat and walked to his office door, luckily for me his receptionist has left her desk for lunch, so it was all clear. I knoc
Sophia's journey - how to open up and love 18
** Lewis point of view **Everything went by in a blur.The ambulance had come along with the firefighters. They had to cut Sophia out of the car, it was heart breaking to see it all happen.As I was getting checked over by the ambulance crew, a police man came to me to ask me questions. I answered the best I could but it happened so fast I couldn't really remember anything."Thank you for your time" the police officer said. "We will now take statements form the witnesses. If we have anything else to ask you, we will get in touch."I just nodded my head, I was in shock. All I wanted to do was get back to Sophia and make sure she was all right.When Sophia was finally cut out of the car, it felt like it took them a lifetime to do so, she was rushed into the ambulance."Please can I come to?" I pleaded to the ambulance staff."Yes. We have to leave now."
