All Chapters of Sophia's journey - how to open up and love: Chapter 1 - Chapter 10

I woke up screaming and sweating, myself and the bed are soaked. I feel disgusted and dirty. That was one of the worst nightmares I have had. It felt like I was back there, going through it all again. It was so real.The only thing that would help right now is a nice shower. I rubbed my eyes and looked around the room. I was in my bedroom not on the floor back there. It was a relief. I pulled the covers to the side and slipped out of my bed, I love the feel of the carpet between my toes, something about it is so comforting.Wrapping myself in my white dressing gown after my shower I stood in front of the mirror, I hated looking at my reflection, I looked pale and tired, I had big bags under my blue eyes, my blonde hair was a mess and my normally plump lips that are the shape of cupids bow, looked thin and dry. I closed my eyes and opened them straight away, I was breathing heavily and shaking, when I closed my eyes I could see his face smirking at m

The next week went by with very little sleep, ever time I closed my eyes, all I could see was him. I just kept on replying what happened. How he tried to force himself on me again, how I turned back into the child I was back then. ** flashback to that night **"Come on get undressed for me. I want to see if you are just as sweet as you was back then.""Ryan. NO!" I managed to scream. "You remember my name. How sweet. Now don't make me angry. I will rip your clothes of and ruin you. You stupid woman. You think I was bad then. Just wait and see." He snarled in my face.How could I forget his name. He took my innocence.I was instantly transformed back into my younger self. I froze not sure what to do. He grabbed ahold of my dress and slipped it off my shoulders, his hand was cupping my breast. I felt sick, I felt helpless. I just wanted someone to come and save me.He pulled my dress all

Once I got back home, I sent Hugo a message to say I got back okay. He had offered to take me home but I didn't want him to know where I live. It's not just him but everyone. I have to trust you for you to know such things and at this moment, Hugo is not there yet. Don't get me wrong I think he is trustworthy but a part of me can't let him in.The next day Sally was coming round for a movie day. We tend to do this most Sunday, we just love to chill, eat a load of crap food and chat. What better way to do it.Sally was in my kitchen heating up popcorn in the microwave while I was sorting out the pillows and blankets in the livingroom. "Eveything is set up. Are you done yet!" I shouted from the livingroom. "Yep!" Sally shouted directly behind me."Shit! Are you trying to give me a heart attack." I said while clutching my chest "You are so easy to scare"Sally was chuckling so hard I thought sh

With her hands on my shoulders Sally said "Hey just breath. In, out, in, out. You can do this."I walked over to the door and opened it, to be greeted by his beautiful smile.Once we were inside the living room I apologized for the size of my place and the lack of seating.Hugo didn't seem to mind as he said "It's okay, it's a nice place you have and I'm just grateful I'm finally allowed to see it"The smile on his face made my knees go week. I still can't believe that he is into someone like me.We watched two movies in the end and ordered pizza. I'm sure Hugo has never ordered a takeaway pizza before, if I'm going off the face he pulled when he tried it. It was so funny, his face was bunched up in disgust, but to his credit he finished the slice.We were all cleaning up the mess we had made when Hugo came up behind me and snaked his hands around my waist and kissed my cheek. I blushed so har

"Son. Your mum is right, we have raised you well but we can't leave this earth thinking you are all alone. You need someone who will be by your side." My dad looked lovenly at my mum. "Someone you will have children with, to live a full happy life."When he looked at me and went to say something but I cut him off by asking "but why can't I find someone myself?" "We have given you plenty of chances to find someone yourself, all you did was ignore us not thinking about the consequences. I'm sorry son but we have made the decision.""Give me this last chance, I will find someone." I pleaded"Fine. One last chance you have till the end of the month to find someone." My dad said in a stern voice, the one where I knew he ment business. I leaned against the closed door and heard my mum say "It's a shame our original arrangement with Charles can never go ahead."