Chapter 6 Everything starts with a voice

Marina's pov :

Through all that painful hours of labor,I finally gave birth to a girl. But, I wasn't able to see her, she was kept in incubation because she was born a month early. The delivery made me feel unconscious and tired that I was brought back to my senses after many hours.

After waking up, I couldn't see my baby and  the various thoughts started to roam from one end of my mind to another end.

For whole three days, I did nothing but think. Just think. Many horrible and scarier ideas evolved in my mind. What was the more horrible was I wanted to do what I supposed not to do and regretted a lot.

My baby was still in incubator. Jacob used to  come to visit me everyday. Whenever, I saw Jacob, I always wanted to ask him for help but I hesitated for some reasons.

On the third day, I requested him, "Can you do a thing for me? "

"What is it? Is there anything that you wanna eat or drink? ,he asked.

"No, it's not something like that. I want to ask something big. But first of all take me to Captain Jim. "

"What the hell are you saying? Do you know what are you asking for? It's like walking, directly to the lions den. You're asking for your death. "

"Please. "

"Are you mad?I cannot do this? I can take you myself but it will probably put you and your child's life in danger. "

"So, I wanna keep everything secret right now. Please."

I urged him for a while and with a heavy heart he approved my request.

"You have to be safe. That's all. "

Travelling for two hours in a taxi, I reached his home. I didn't get inside but I saw his house from far afar.

I stood at one of the corner and kept on looking at that house. He came out and his wife too. They looked happy. How can you be happy after ruining every parts of my life? How can you even smile after commiting such a horrible murder?Captain Jim, you cannot be spared. Your sin cannot be spared? Your returned for your family and for your wife but your horrible act had kept a son away from a family, away from his wife and away from the new born baby.

Then, I saw another view, that made me to think that he should suffer, too and there would be no other better reason for him to suffer.

How would a father feel when his grown infant would be taken away from him? How much he would suffer when his own son, disappears from his world? I thought the greatest suffering for a father would be that. These kinds of filthy thought came to my mind.

After, I saw the his infant who could be not more than some one or two  years, my mind thought and planned for only one thing. REVENGE

I prepared myself to take a revenge with him. He is an animal not a human.

A human who has lost his humanity is no more a human. He is a wild animal and wild animals do not deserve to stay with human i human world.

I was certainly in rage. Watching him for more and more minutes boiled me into rage the more.

Then, I said, "We should return now. "

"Yeah," he asked for a taxi.We got in.

But, in the midst of the way, I asked him to stop the taxi and take me to somewhere there are less people. He stopped and brought me there.

"What happen? Are you uncomfortable? Is something wrong with your health? "

"No, I wanna ask for something more. The bigger than the previous one. Get me Captain Jim's son."

"What? Are you really out of your mind? Now, you have completely turned into a crazy woman. How can you ask that? Do you know what you're asking for? "

"Captain Jim still don't know me. And, I know what I am doing? You told me you felt guilty for him. I want to take a revenge for him. I need a revenge. He cannot stay happy.He should not stay happy after ruining my family. For now, I have only two choice.First, to neglect all of this and get back to my home silently and the second one is to get back at him, to make him pay for his sins.I want to choose the latter one," I said.

"But, it's really out of your league.You cannot do this. He is someone really powerful. You cannot revenge him. Look at him and look at you. You are a mere woman and what about your own child?What are you going to do with her?," he said.

"I'm not going to see my family, until I know all of the answer, until I do not get revenge. I have a request.You told me that, you're rich and I heard your father has orphanage. I think, while I am on this process, she would be most safe there. Please, arrange that for me."

"You have completely gone crazy. Completely mad.. You are gonna make troubles for me and for yourself too. You really don't know what you're asking for? "

"You told me everything starts with a voice. The voice within me is calling me again and again  for this. Again and again, it's calling me for revenge. I have to get up to end. If you're going to help me, I would appreciate that you still respect him and want his unjust death be justified and if you don't wanna join me, then I will do it alone. "

Saying this, I walked to the taxi and got back to the hospital. I had left for whole day for a reason and still I had not seen my daughter. I had no courage to look at her.

Her mother was going to be a criminal. Her mother was going to make her orphan. She was fatherless from before and her mother was going to make her motherless as well. I thought it was more important than being with her.

Will Jacob help me on this? I needed my daughter to get to safe place first, where even my shadows couldn't hunt her. I needed her to be away from me and live a good life. Obviously, I would support her in all her finances but I don't want to see her face. Or, I can't show her my face. She should never know, her mother lived such a horrible life and her mother was thinking to turn into a monster too. I nearly turned to a monster, a criminal that day.